Do you want more sleep?   Yes! I need more sleep.

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Reader Interactions


  1. Evelyne says

    I heard them all as well and my mom-in-law will not stop of telling me to keep her awake all day even after we explains her x times that it would make it worst. And she kept telling us when there was no problem; my daughter always slept a good 4-5 hours straight at some point during the day/night. However, she would ONLY sleep in our arms or would not sleep at all. I kept hearing it was my fault she was not sleeping in her crib; I just had to put her in it at nap time and bedtime… I figured she needed us and hoped it would not last forever. She started sleeping on her own at 2 months old at night ONLY.

    Then around 14-15 weeks, she started waking up a lot some nights and resisting falling asleep for naps and night sleep. She will twitch and move after breastfeeding, whining and not sleeping. From the moment I see her getting tired it can take me an hour to have her take her nap. At night, it can take over 2 hours of rocking-chair, singing, breastfeeding sessions.

    @katherine My daughter also naps on me after breastfeeding. If I put her in her crib during day time she will wake up after 2 minutes and not nap. I’d rather she naps then having that time to do chores or exercise….

    • Emily DeJeu says

      @ Evelyne — I’m glad you were able to avoid feeling pressured/guilty by other people, and that you were able to stick to managing sleep the way you wanted to. 🙂 Thanks for sharing!

  2. Elijah says

    My in-laws are Chinese (in China). They’ve never heard of a baby “sleeping through the night.” My mother-in-law found it to be a very strange notion.

    • Emily DeJeu says

      @Elijah – I’ve heard this from some of our Chinese clients as well! Really interesting, who cultural differences can play such a huge part in our expectations about sleep.

  3. Debbye @ The Baby Sleep Site says

    @ Alison – Yes, it is SO true that all children are different! Good for you for finding what works for your little one!
    Thanks for commenting!

    @ Jennifer – Thanks for writing! It is very hard when books contradict each other, and even more confusing if one book contradicts itself! As if new parenthood is not complicated enough! Yikes! It is true that once a baby is older, and therefor his/her stomach is larger and ready for solids that he can likely sleep longer without a feed. Starting solids “too early” however does not generally help, as their stomachs are still too little to stay full for too long.

    @ Rachel – So sorry about your less than pleasant experiences with (the first two) pediatricians! I do hope that the third time is the charm, and that you can utilize our resources to find some answers/help for your daughter’s sleep. Thanks for writing, hang in there, and good luck!

    @ Emily – What a great attitude/perspective to have Emily! Hopefully the move to her own room will help and she will still “remember” how to sleep, whether you are home or not!
    Thank you for commenting!

  4. Emily says

    I appreciate this article! All of these are so true. With my first, I was awake multiple times a night almost every single night until he was about 15 months old, moved up to the “toddler room” at his childcare and all kids napped at a set time. I’m convinced seeing the other kids do it and having the teachers gently help the kids fall asleep worked. My second is almost 12 mo now and has been a better sleeper, but still wakes. I’ve taken 2 work trips and when I’m gone, she cries a bit at night in papa’s arms but by the 2nd night, she’s sleeping all the way through, or almost (her crib is in our room, I guess time to move it out!).

    Anyway the point is, with my first child I was obsessed with sleep. This time around, I know that 1) it can be a lot worse, 2) we can handle it and 3) she will figure it out eventually. Very freeing. Thanks for supporting a more normal perspective on sleeping through the night!

  5. Rachel says

    Yep, heard all of those multiple times. I could write a book on all the frustrating/misinformed/parent-blaming pieces of sleep “advice” I’ve been told just by my mother, let alone from the rest of my extended family and random strangers in the grocery store. But here’s my two best:
    -“that’s the price you pay for a baby who sleeps through the night” when asking my pediatrician about my 4 month old who wouldn’t nap AT ALL and screamed the WHOLE day (but did sleep at the time about 4-6 hours at night.) Thanks. Maybe it’s time to try a new pediatrician…
    -“well you should have thought of that before having kids” when asking the next pediatrician at my daughter’s 12-month appointment how to improve her ongoing terrible sleeping. Thanks. I guess we’re on the hunt for a new doctor again. Oh the joys of living in Canada!

  6. Jennifer says

    I’m not completely convinced that solids have nothing to do with sleeping through the night. Especially when you read books from trusted sleep experts (like Weissbluth) that will say in one chapter that feeding solids will not help baby sleep through the night, and then the next chapter he says that baby will not be able to sleep through the night until they are on solids. More calories during the day certainly helps hold them over longer.

  7. Alison says

    To me the biggest myth is that anything is true or will work for all babies!! For example, EVERYTHING I read says ‘don’t let baby get overtired’. HA! I can’t get mine to sleep unless they’re good and tired. (Mine is the one who needs to run at the park to take a nap!) I’m sure there’s a limit to this, but I get myself into trouble when I try for sleep too early, not too late!

  8. Debbye @ The Baby Sleep Site says

    @ Kaz – Thank you for writing! Yes, this sounds like a common phase, which should subside within a few weeks. here is a link with more info:
    Hang in there, and I hope that things improve very soon!

    @ Wren – Yes! I have heard this too! Thanks for commenting!

    @ TraceyC – Thank you for sharing your myths! You are so right that every parent needs to do what is right for them and their family!
    Thank you for commenting!

  9. Debbye @ The Baby Sleep Site says

    @ Kendra – Yes!! This one fits in nicely with our #2 myth! It does happen to work for a few families, bit most babes will just get overtired and sleep worse! Regular naps are better!
    Thank you for commenting!

    @ Vera – I am sorry that you are struggling with sleep! it is tough when you get teased with good sleep for a few days or weeks before the next hurdle!
    Hang in there and thank you for writing!!

    @ Veronica – Thank you for writing, and we are happy to hear that number 3 is sleeping well for you! it is sometimes amazing how different siblings can be!
    Thank you for commenting!

  10. Debbye @ The Baby Sleep Site says

    @ Lansmom – Thank you for writing and sharing your experience! Yes 2-3 feeds at 4 months is typical, but will not last forever! Good for you for deciding what is right for your baby.
    Thanks for commenting!

    @ Laura – This one is SOO true! The road to sleep is rarely a straight one!
    Thanks for adding to our list of myths!

    @ Sue – Sometimes “cluster feeding” can help a baby to sleep better, especially in the early weeks, but you’re right… It is not the end all to night wakings, and overfeeding/stuffing a baby can lead to overflow, as you’ve experienced! I am sorry that you had a rough go of it, and thank you for sharing!

    @ Katherine Morgan – Thank you for writing and sharing your experience! We do find that in most cases, 13 month olds should not need to feed during the night, but do not let anyone get you down. You are doing best for your child by helping her sleep while she needs it! If you are fine with the 2 feeds, then there is no reason to change it. If you are ready to make some changes, you may want to consider very gently weaning the night feeds, so that your daughter can slowly adjust to feeding less at night and more in the day. Here is a link with more info:
    Good luck and thank you for commenting!