2 year old sleep problems | The Baby Sleep Site - Baby / Toddler Sleep Consultants

toddler sleep problems 9

Here’s a myth that needs to be debunked: sleep problems go away when babies grow into toddlers. After working with over 25,000 families we’ve learned that’s simply not true! Yes, some babies will outgrow their sleep problems, but far more babies who take short naps and wake often at night simply grow into toddlers who take short naps and wake often at night.

Here’s something else: while some sleep problems are universal, regardless of your baby’s age, other sleep problems are unique to toddlerhood. That’s why it’s key to know what kinds of sleep issues you may be facing as your baby enters the toddler years. Keep reading to learn the top 9 toddler sleep problems, and how to cope.

9 Common Toddler Sleep Problems (And How To Cope With Them)

Jack-in-the-box behavior
Once your toddler is out of his crib and into a big-kid bed, you’ll most likely have at least a little bit of what we call jack-in-the-box behavior: your toddler will spring out of bed, and you’ll have to tuck him back in. For some toddlers, though, this problem is incredibly persistent! To deal with this, simply out-persistent your persistent child. Do what we call the “silent return to bed”: every time your child gets up, calmly and quietly return him to bed. Don’t engage, or let your child see you upset; if your toddler can get a reaction out of you, he’s more likely to repeat the behavior.

Short (or missed) naps
There are several big nap transitions during toddlerhood: your toddler will transition from two naps to one nap at around 15-18 months, and then your toddler will be done napping somewhere between 3 and 4 years of age. These nap transitions can take quite a toll; many toddlers will have short, late, or skipped naps during the transition phase, which can lead to overtired crankiness and bedtime drama. To deal with this, you can use the tips in our nap transition article, available to our Baby Sleep Site® members. (Not a member? Become one today!)

Bedtime (and nap time) stalling
Some toddlers are practically professional bedtime stallers. Just one more drink, just one more book, just one more kiss for all 50 of her stuffed animal friends….you get the idea! Take heart, though – while this is a very frustrating problem, it’s also incredibly common. To deal with bedtime stalling, check out the tips and techniques in our article, 5 Gentle Techniques for Managing Toddler Bedtime Stalling.

Separation anxiety
Separation anxiety first surfaces during babyhood, around 8-9 months. However, many parents see a resurgence around 18 months and then again around 2 years of age. Separation anxiety on its own is bad enough (because it is just plain heartbreaking to have to leave a sobbing baby at daycare drop-off!), but it can be a real problem at bedtime and nap time. For help with separation anxiety, take a look at this article on How To Handle Separation Anxiety and Sleep.

Bedtime anxiety and fear
Your toddler has a budding imagination, which is great! But that budding imagination can create bedtime fears, which in turn can make bedtime an anxious time, which is less great. For more insights into why your child has nighttime fears, as well as how you can help alleviate those fears, check out this helpful article about nighttime phobias.

Wide-awake bedtime
Oh, man – I think all of us have dealt with this one! The clock says bedtime, you’ve gone through the bedtime routine….but your toddler is showing NO signs of being ready to sleep! This is a very common problem during toddlerhood, and it has to do with your toddler’s schedule. If your toddler still naps, then you may actually need a later bedtime, as opposed to an earlier bedtime. Toddlers who still take one afternoon nap, for example, need a full 5 hours of wake time between the end of the nap and bedtime. So if your toddler’s nap ends at 3:30, you’re looking at an 8:30 bedtime. For help with finding the ideal bedtime for your toddler, check out our free custom schedule maker.

Nightmares and/or night terrors
Remember that budding imagination I mentioned earlier, that causes nighttime fear and anxiety? Well, it also causes nightmares (and, for some toddlers, night terrors). Nightmares and night terrors are very, very common during the toddler years; however, they can be really tough on sleep (your toddler’s AND yours!). Fortunately, we have tips! Check out our nightmare and night terror series.

Middle-of-the-night munchies
This won’t affect every toddler, but it affects some. Many parents find, as their toddlers grow, that middle-of-the-night hunger becomes increasingly problematic. The reason? Simple – your toddler is growing and burning a lot of calories! This problem is usually fixed by a healthy bedtime snack – just be sure it is low in sugar, and be sure your toddler brushes his teeth afterwards. You can see more tips for helping your toddler sleep through the night here, in this toddler sleep training article.

Early-morning waking
Again, this won’t be a problem for every toddler, but for some families, their toddler’s early waking becomes a huge problem. The causes behind toddler early waking are varied: some toddlers simply need less nap sleep (which translates into more nighttime sleep and a later wake-up time), while others wake early because their rooms are too bright (a problem which can be solved by black-out curtains). Still other toddlers wake early because they are just excited to start the day! One thing that can really help in general with early waking is a toddler clock; these clocks display lights or symbols that let your toddler know when she should stay in bed, and when she should get up. We like the Okay to Wake clock, but there are many you could try.

Need Help With Toddler Sleep Problems? Look No Further!

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If you’ve followed this blog for awhile, you’re likely no stranger to the concept of sleep regressions. You’ve probably experienced them first-hand, right? 😉 If you’re new here, however, let us fill you in. A sleep regression refers to a period of time when a baby or toddler who’s been sleeping well suddenly begins waking at night and during naptime, or even refusing to go to sleep at all.

There are several distinct regression phases that most babies and toddlers experience: one at 4 months, another at 8, 9, or 10 months, a third around 18 months, and (as if three weren’t enough!) a final one around 2 years. This article will focus on some of the challenges surrounding your 2 year old’s sleep, including elements that are part of the 2 year sleep regression.

5 Facts About Your 2 Year Old’s Sleep

1: Your 2 year old’s awake time is longer.

As your toddler grows, she needs progressively less sleep than she did as an infant. Most 2 year olds need approximately 12 hours of sleep in a 24 hour period, on average; compare that to a newborn’s need for about 16 hours of sleep! And of course, most of your toddler’s sleep is happening at night now. You may also find that your 2 year old is showing more resistance to bedtime than usual, and that she’s falling asleep late. Or, she may be waking too early. All this adds up to equal less downtime (and maybe less sleep!) for you.

Nicole’s note:
“We start getting a lot of e-mails around this time of year that toddlers are beginning to “fight bedtime.” Here in the States, when we are approaching summer, it stays light later and this can directly influence your toddler’s internal clock. Nights may get shorter, but this is temporary! She may truly be unable to fall asleep at an earlier time.”

2: Your 2 year old’s separation anxiety may resurface around this time.

Separation anxiety peaks around 18 months, but it can appear off and on until your child is 5 or 6 (or maybe even after! Yikes!!) At age 2, separation anxiety can be based on actual fear; your 2 year old may be afraid to be left alone, or with people he doesn’t know. However, it can also come from a desire not to miss out on the fun! By now, your 2 year old knows that when you leave, you don’t just disappear. Instead, he knows that you’re off somewhere not far away, having (in his mind, at least) tons of fun without him. Understandably, he doesn’t want to be left out! If this separation anxiety surfaces as soon as you walk out the door during naptime and/or bedtime, it can disrupt your toddler’s sleep.

Nicole’s note:
“Many parents report they have to, all of a sudden, stay with their 2 year old as she falls asleep at nap and bedtime. This is SO common!”

3: Your 2 year old may suddenly stop napping.

Around 2 years of age, some toddlers abruptly stop taking an afternoon nap. You might find that when you put your 2 year old down for her nap, she spends the entire hour talking/laughing/singing/playing. Or, you may find that your 2 year old’s nap resistance isn’t nearly so pleasant — she may spend the whole hour screaming! As with separation anxiety, this sudden resistance to naps can come from your 2 year old’s desire not to miss out on anything. It can also be the result of her growing self-awareness and independence — she’s becoming more aware of what she wants, so if she doesn’t want to lie down for a nap, she’s going to let you know it!

We advise parents to treat this sudden naptime resistance as a regression, and not as something permanent. Most children won’t completely give up their naps until 3 or 4. It’s best to simply stay consistent with your 2 year old’s schedule and routine, and to not give up on the nap just yet.

Nicole’s note:
“All 2 year olds are different, of course. We, personally, had to stop allowing a nap around 2 1/2, because my son’s awake time approached 7 hours after nap and waking up at 3pm…well you can do the math. It was after my bedtime!”

4: Your 2 year old may be going through some transitions that disrupt sleep.

There are a few common transitions your 2 year old may be experiencing:

Moving to a big boy / big girl bed: Although more children make this transition closer to age 3, some toddlers make this step at age 2. This new sleeping arrangement can make it harder for your 2 year old to sleep well at night and for naps, since the new bed is unfamiliar. You may also find your 2 year old taking advantage of his new-found freedom and getting out of bed often, even when you’ve told him again and again to stay put! (A side note: Whether you do it age 2 or wait a bit longer, when the time does come to make the move to a big kid bed, we recommend that you toddler proof your toddler’s room carefully.)
Potty training: Again, most children aren’t potty trained until age 3 (or even later.) But some parents begin the potty training process around age 2. If your 2 year old is in the midst of potty training, you may find her waking from sleep and needing to use the potty. And even those 2 year olds who haven’t begun potty training yet are still becoming more and more aware of their bodily functions. It’s not uncommon for toddlers this age to wake early in the morning from a full bladder or needing to poop. And by age 2, most children are much more aware of the uncomfortable feeling that a wet or full diaper causes.
New sibling: Of course, this doesn’t apply to all 2 year olds, but around age 2, some children are preparing for or adjusting to having a new brother or sister around. This is a huge change for toddlers, and (as with all major changes) it can cause lots of anxiety for them. Couple that with the fact that the new baby is likely causing some anxiety for you, too (as you work to juggle multiple schedules), and it can mean that no one is getting much sleep!

Nicole’s note:
“We potty trained around 2 1/2 with both boys (which was late for one and a good age for the other). You might remember my article about potty training my second son, here: 6 ways Potty Training is Like Sleep Training.”

5: Your 2 year old may begin having nighttime fears.

By age 2, your toddler is becoming much more imaginative. This makes for really fun and entertaining play, but boy, can it ever be a problem at night! Most 2 year olds’ nighttime fears are triggered by the dark, and all the things that come with it — spooky shadows, monsters lurking under the bed, etc. By this age, toddlers are growing more aware of the world and realizing that there are “bad guys” and things out there that can hurt them. These new nighttime fears can lead to things like nightmares, and even night terrors.

Nicole’s note:
“My eldest (who inspired this blog) began to be afraid of dinosaurs, no matter how many times I tried to define the word ‘extinct’. 🙂 These aren’t always rational fears to us adults, but very real to them, so be patient and empathetic.”

As with any regression or phase, the best thing to do when you encounter these problems is to cope as best you can. Work hard to stay consistent, and try to remind yourself that it won’t last forever. 🙂 Keep in mind, too, that you don’t want your toddler to form any bad habits while you’re working on getting through the 2 year sleep regression, so let that guide your decisions about how you’re going to cope. As Nicole always says, “You don’t want to make or continue long-term habits for a short-term phase.”

Finally, if you’re doing your best to cope with your 2 year old’s terrible sleep but are finding yourself at the end of your rope, consider contacting us. We have the products and services you need to get your 2 year old sleeping well again.

Want FREE sleep help that you can put to use right away? Download a copy of our free guide, Toddler Sleep Secrets! The guide is available to download instantly, which means you can start using the techniques in it as early as tonight. So download now, and learn why your toddler is waking at night and resisting naps – and what you can do about it.

Did your 2 year old experience any of these sleep challenges? How did you cope? Or are you going through this right now? Scroll down to share your story and to hear from other parents just like you!

Need Toddler Sleep Help? We Have the Resources You Need!

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