A client e-mailed me not too long ago concerned about what a co-worker told her about her baby. Her co-worker told her that if she didn't sleep train and let her baby cry it out, her baby would grow up to be spoiled. She alluded to the fact that by the time he was 7 or 8 years old, he'd be "running the show." This particular client has experience with two very different cultures, one being in the West and one in the East. In the West (where she lives now) she feels tremendous pressure to let
babies cry it out
How Sleep Training Progress Looks
When parents update me on their sleep training progress, sometimes it is a little frustrating for them if their baby has a good night one night, then a bad night and some back and forth. I thought it would be a good idea to talk about that in today's post and why it happens. If nothing else, I know it helps to have realistic expectations while sleep training. One of the biggest lessons I learned when I was struggling with my own son's sleep problems is that when the books implied all of our
Controlled Crying, Cry It Out, No-Cry, or Soothe Baby to Sleep?
Controlled Crying. Cry it out. Don't cry it out. Soothe your baby. Co-sleep. Don't co-sleep. The advice is endless and talk to one expert, say your baby's doctor, and she will say one thing. Talk to another one and he might say do the opposite. Read this book or that book and it's likely to say yet another thing. This week I was quoted as one of three experts in Hudson Valley Parent in an article called Let Them Cry or Rock-a-Bye. One of my quotes reiterates how I believe all families and
How Long to Cry It Out (CIO)
This topic "How long to cry it out?" has come up a few times in the last few weeks in one way or another, so I thought I'd talk about it this week. I always preface any discussion about cry it out by making sure that everyone understands that I'm not a "Cry It Out Pusher" and I'm very much NOT an extremist or a hard-core "sleep trainer". I try to be realistic and just know that all babies are different and all family structures are different and what works for one won't work for everyone. I even
Will Cry-It-Out Change Your Baby / Child’s Personality?
I happened upon an article where a woman (and husband) was against cry-it-out and specifically, The Ferber Method, but ended up doing it anyway, because it was what worked. In that article, Confessions of a Ferberizer, she said that, in the end, her son stopped wanting to be rocked or cuddle. She did not seem to regret doing cry-it-out, I don't think, but reading the article reminded me that many of us wonder whether doing cry-it-out will change our child's personality, so I thought I'd reflect