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Do you want more sleep?   Yes! I need more sleep.

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  1. kelli says:

    My daughter is almost 3. I’m a single parent. She goes to sleep in her own bed relatively easy every night. We read a few books and I put her in her bed and then I sit in the doorway and wait for her to go to sleep, then go about my business. An hour or so later I get ready and go to sleep in my own bed. She always wakes up in the night and calls out for me, I take her to the potty and then bring her back to my bed. Usually this is 2-4 hours after she goes to sleep. At first it was so I could go back to sleep as I wake up for work at 530am, and now its purely habit. I don’t mind really, we both sleep well. There has been the odd night where she’s slept in her bed for 4-6 hours before coming to mine, but she ALWAYS wakes up in my bed in the morning. I worry she’s going to be 12 and still wanting to sleep with me, ultimately I’d really like her to have an awesome sleep in her own bed all night and wake up in it. I’ve tried offering her a present if she sleeps in her bed all night, but I don’t think she really understands, because it is such a habit now. Also because I get up for work early, Grandma comes over and crawls back in bed with her and the goal is for her to then wake around 730am, but lately she’s been waking before Grandma arrives because she’s alone in my bed. It’s a challenge.

    • Janelle Reid says:

      Hi @Kelli, thanks for your comment. I am sorry you’ve been struggling with your daughter waking in your bed. If you decide you want to work on getting her to stay in her bed the whole night, you may want to download our free guide with toddler sleep tricks as they are so different to sleep train than sleep training a baby: https://www.babysleepsite.com/toddler-sleep-tips
      If you need more help our sleep consultants are standing by to help too. You can view the options to work one-on-one with a consultant to help create a plan just for you and your daughter here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-toddler-sleep-consulting-services/
      I hope this helps! Hang in there.

  2. Crystal says:

    My son will be 4 in a couple weeks and we have become accidental cosleepers for almost a year now. We tried many different philosophies over the course of a few months, stuck with each one for a couple weeks and then I decided there was too much anxiety associated with bedtime and gave up. He goes to sleep in his own bed with me sitting on the floor by the door and then somewhere between 3-5am he comes into our bed. I used to walk him back to his room and he’d go back to sleep without a problem but he would eventually end up back in our room. Then we started not waking up when he came in… I don’t want him sleeping with us but I can’t imagine he’ll still be doing this in highschool…

    • Janelle Reid says:

      Hi @Crystal, thanks for visiting the Baby Sleep Site. It can be so tough to break a habit like that. If you decide you want help with it, let us know. Our sleep consultants would be happy to help you transition your son back to his bed so you can all get an uninterrupted night’s sleep. Here is the link to look at the options to work one on one with a consultant: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-toddler-sleep-consulting-services/
      I hope this helps!

  3. Terri says:

    We’ll be going on vacation in a few months and I’m very certain that our new 2 yr old will not want to sleep alone. How can we get her to sleep away from home, not with us AND return to sleeping in her own bed once we’re back at home?

    She’s always slept in her own bed and still does. Being away from home is different-she won’t do the pack N play anymore and slept with us the last two times we were away. Thankfully she returned to her bed without a fuss. She takes all naps in her crib as well. That’s probably our fault because she won’t sleep unless she’s in her bed. We need help with that too… Or will she it grow it?

    • Janelle Reid says:

      Hi @Terri, thanks for visiting the Baby Sleep Site! I can relate to having very conditioned sleepers that only want to sleep in their specific space. It’s awesome when you’re home, but difficult when you have to leave that routine for whatever reason. What I try to do is bring as many things that are the same that I can – same bedding, lovey, white noise, etc. Maybe you could even try putting her pack n play in her room for a few days/weeks to get her use to sleeping it that rather than her crib. As she gets older she will begin to understand more and will be able to see that this is “special” so she can transition a little easier. Trust me I was convinced my son at the age of 2 would never be flexible – ever – but he’s really smoothed out for the most part now that he’s almost 4 and can sleep in other places easily if we have his special blanket.
      Here is a link for some sleep tips that will hopefully help: https://www.babysleepsite.com/travel/traveling-with-baby-toddler/
      Have a wonderful vacation and good luck with everything!

  4. Kathryn says:

    Our DS is turning 1year old in 5 days?. He is a persistent, highly energetic, amazingly inconsistent (w sleep) spirit who clearly ignores & tries to override his sleepiness to keep playing/doing/being w everyone. We have done multiple versions of co-sleeping approx 95% of his life. For the last 6months I’ve been w him for all naps & nighttime sleep; am able to sneak out on random occasions. We hired y’all close to his 6month bday, I think. The very thorough plan helped w multiple aspects, but did NOT result in no, little, or even less crying than CIO(which we don’t want to do). He is persistently persistent.
    We have alot of frustrations & gripes:(, but currently I am most curious — why does he still wake up every 45min to 2.5 hours? I only nurse him after 4am, & he knows that (he’ll go back to sleep w other soothing methods –most of the time). Even if he’s put himself to sleep (w us in the room, it’s screaming crying mayhem otherwise), he wakes 3 – 10x/night, literally no rhyme or reason why the difference. Literally. The biggest response we got from y’all was “he’s overtired”; but that doesn’t always hold water! We had him on reflux meds & that helped the screaming/crying, but the wakings have persisted. Thoughts?

    • Danielle says:

      @Kathryn Hi there! I’m sorry to hear that you’re still having so much trouble with your son’s sleep! Since you’ve worked with us before, I went ahead and emailed you privately with some information that I hope will help. Please do let us know if we can be of any further help. Hang in there!

  5. Hope says:

    I have co-slept with all three of my children, at least to a certain extent. My last child was very easy to sleep train at a young age, though I did sleep occasionally with him when I was too tired to get him back in his crib or when he was sick. My daughter is almost 6 months and she is determined to keep eating every two hours, so I’m not sure when I will be able to get her to sleep in her own crib. In fact, she will not let me put her down anymore while she naps, she wakes up every single time. Motherhood teaches so much patience!

    As far as safety, I am very careful with covers/pillows/bedding etc. I know we can never be too careful with our precious gifts from God! I don’t think I ever really fall into a deep sleep while co-sleeping because of that reason.

  6. Mimi says:

    I, and a lot of other families who I know of, co-sleep with covers, and none of our children have died. I simply get under the sheet/comforter and put the baby in the crook of my arm on top of the sheet. It really is up to you, but don’t think that you have to wear ten layers of clothing for the next year in order to co-sleep. Very impractical and uncomfortable, especially when you have to nurse in the middle of the night. If you do research into SIDS deaths, you will see that the babies died because their caregivers fell asleep with the conscious intention of co-sleeping/were intoxicated and, again, had no intention of co-sleeping, not because mommy dared to get under the sheets with baby on top of it.

    I’m an accidental co-sleeper who became a permanent co-sleeper, because I realised that my newborn kept waking up every hour in her bassinet, because she craved human contact.

    • Danielle says:

      @Mimi Hi Mimi! I’m so glad to hear that co-sleeping worked well for your family. We want all families to get the best sleep they can and definitely, different options will work for different people. But, since unfortunate accidents can happen, we just want to make sure that all parents have access to the best information to make evidence-based decisions for their families 🙂 The link Katherine provided has some great information for families who are considering co-sleeping, and we encourage parents to check in with their child’s pediatrician, too, since some health conditions can make co-sleeping less safe. Thank you so much for your comment!

  7. Elizabeth says:

    Thank you for replying. Katherine what do you recommend I use instead of a duvet to keep warm? Currently still swaddling baby in a light blanket.

    • Katherine Benskey says:

      @ Elizabeth the recommendations for safe sleeping are that no bedcovers are used when co-sleeping. Unfortunately, this would include any blankets or covers for you, as well. 🙁 You may want to try heavy clothing to keep warm. I know many of the precautions to safe co-sleeping are challenging for some families, but are so important! You may want to check out this article on safe co-sleeping: https://www.parentingscience.com/bed-sharing.html

      I hope this link is helpful and good luck!

  8. Savannah says:

    I’m not an expert, but we have co-slept with all of our three children. You want to avoid heavy or fluffy blankets and comforters or duvets, which could cover baby. We use the sheet, plus a couple of light blankets. I always have the baby in the crook of my arm, and do not cover baby with our blankets. Also, be careful not to over dress baby for sleep, as they usually stay quite warm just from being held close.

  9. Elizabeth says:

    Can I ask what bedding should safely be used when sharing with a baby under 1? You say above not to use loose things…? Can you give a clear example please?

    • Katherine Benskey says:

      @ Elizabeth, we recommend not having any loose blankets, sheets, pillows, or stuffed animals for babies this age, due to safety concerns. You also want to try to prevent overheating for this reason, as well; babies who are too hot are at higher risk of SIDS. If you are worried that your baby is cold, you can consider using a sleep sack. These wearable blankets provide warmth, but they don’t carry the same risks as loose, heavy blankets. Hope this helps! 🙂

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