How (and When) To Transition Your Toddler From a Crib to a Bed
Here’s a common toddler-related question we hear often:
“When should I transition my toddler from his crib to a ‘big kid’ bed? And how exactly am I supposed to do it?!”
Is that a question that’s been on your mind lately? If so, never fear — it’s the question we’re answering in today’s article!
When To Transition Your Toddler From Crib to Bed
First, let’s tackle the “when” of making the crib-to-bed transition. There’s no easy answer to this one — ages for making this transition vary from family to family. However, it’s interesting to note that the average age for making the switch from crib to bed is between 3 and 4 years.
Typically, we here at The Baby Sleep Site® recommend that you don’t rush into making this transition. Why? Because once you remove those crib bars, you remove your little one’s bedtime boundaries. And that can cause problems. Your little one may take advantage of her newfound freedom, and play the “jack-in-the-box” game with you, popping out of bed every time you turn your back. That can be exhausting.
So don’t rush into making this switch; if your little one is doing fine in her crib, then leave her there. If you can wait to make the transition until your toddler is older than 2, then it’ll probably be easier on everyone. (Emphasis on the probably — we’re not making any promises!)
However, if the crib just isn’t working anymore, it may be time to make the switch. For instance, if your toddler is routinely climbing out of her crib, and you feel that her monkey-like antics are starting to become dangerous, consider switching her to a big bed (particularly if she’s past 2 years old).
Or maybe your toddler is just plain too big for his crib. If that’s the case, then it may be time to switch to a big kid bed (again, particularly if he’s past 2 years old.)
Of course, your desire to make the transition may have more to do with you — if you’re expecting a new baby, you may need to transition your toddler out of the crib so that you have it free for the new baby. Again, if your toddler is past 2 years old, then make the switch; if not, then consider getting 2 cribs. We did that in my house for a bit — my oldest son was 19 months old when my second son was born. We used 2 cribs for 6 or 7 months, until my oldest was ready for a bed.
Nicole’s Note:
“The biggest issue here is that even IF your toddler understands he is supposed to stay in bed, he may lack the impulse control to actually do it. We all know adults who lack impulse control, too, but that’s for another day. 🙂 Both our boys transitioned around two years old, but it certainly helped to have solidified our sleep habits, first. I do talk to some families where the loss of boundaries can majorly affect a toddler’s feeling of security, so make sure she’s ready before making the switch.”
What Kind of Bed Should You Transition Your Toddler To?
If your toddler is small, consider transitioning him to a toddler bed. This is a smaller-sized bed that uses a crib mattress instead of a twin-sized mattress. A toddler can feel cozier in a toddler bed than she would in a twin bed, and that may make the transition easier for some toddlers.
Of course, if your toddler is outgrowing the crib, then switching to a toddler bed won’t work (since it’s essentially the same size as the crib.) In this case, you’ll want to transition your toddler to a twin-sized (or larger) bed.
Nicole’s Note:
“Both our boys transitioned to toddler beds, which may or may not have helped, but that only lasted about 6 months, so if money is tight or you think your toddler will transition well, skip the toddler bed. We went from toddler bed to full size bed, so we wouldn’t need to buy yet another bed once they got bigger (and frankly, it’s more comfortable for us to cuddle at bedtime, too!).”
How To Transition Your Toddler From Crib to Bed
There’s no script to follow when you’re helping your toddler switch from a crib to a bed. There are, however, some tips to keep in mind:
- Before you do anything else, safety-proof! Once you remove those crib bars, your toddler is going to have unhindered access to his room. So take some time to carefully toddler-proof that room! If you’re transitioning to a big bed, you’ll also want to invest in some safety bed rails, to prevent any falls.
- Talk to your toddler about the switch ahead of time. Few toddlers will react well to entering their room and suddenly seeing their old bed replaced with a new one. Remember — toddlers like routine and predictability! So let your toddler know what’s coming. Talk about it, and maybe read a book about it (like this one) together.
- Make the big bed welcoming. Pile on your toddler’s favorite toys or stuffed animals. Layer on any favorite blankets or bedding. Consider taking your toddler shopping for new “big kid” sheets, and let her pick them out.
- Consider leaving the crib in the room for a bit. This may or may not work. For some kids, having the crib there proves to be a huge distraction, and only makes the switch harder. For others, though, it makes the switch easier. Toddlers love choices, after all, so if (for a few weeks) you give your toddler the choice to sleep in the crib or the big bed, it can help your toddler feel more in control of the transition.
- Prepare yourself for the “jack-in-the-box.” Your toddler WILL try to get out of his new bed. And that’s understandable — the sudden freedom is bound to go right to his head! So be prepared for it. When your toddler (inevitably) wanders out of bed, quickly put him right back into it. It’s a good idea to make it an emotionless interaction — too much positive or negative reaction on your part will likely serve to make the jack-in-the-box behavior worse. But if your toddler can’t get a rise out of you, he’s likely to quit the behavior faster.
- Don’t expect the transition to happen overnight. It’ll probably be 2-3 weeks before this transition is done, and the new bed feels normal for your toddler. And yes, there will be a handful of rough nights in there. Stick with it, though — be firm, and be consistent. And before you know it, your little one’s new bed will feel just like home.
Want more guidance on how to make the transition from crib to bed an easy one for your toddler? Or maybe you just want to get your wide-awake toddler sleeping and napping better? Join The Baby Sleep Site®‘s Member’s Area and get unlimited access to our toddler e-book, The 5-Step System To Better Toddler Sleep. It includes a wealth of tips on how to tackle your toddler’s sleep issues. Plus, enjoy several toddler-specific tele-seminars, as well as two toddler case studies!
When did you transition your toddler from the crib to a bed? How did you handle it? Share your insights!
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@ Monica — awesome tips! Thanks so much for offering them 🙂
We converted my son’s crib to toddler bed the first time he climbed out for the same fears. The best advise I can give you there is don’t keep but a very few toys in his room and make sure it is totally baby proofed. Books are good. My son would bring several books in bed with him and fall asleep in bed I would go in later and take them off his face and bed so they would be out of his way. Also a baby gate at the door way is a great way to keep them in their room and leaving the door open so they don’t feel too locked in and you can easily peek at them when you need to, then we would threaten to close it if he kept getting up he would get 1 warning then we would close half way with a shoe or book keeping it there. Then all the way. Yes there was some screaming the first couple times we did that and then he go it. Another option that my friend did when her son (very big for his age) climbed out of bed before 2 is they dropped the crib bottom to the floor that gave another foot and he wasn’t able to climb out again 🙂 Hope this helps!
@ Angie — oh, this is so tough! To be honest, this is just a tricky situation all around. 18 months is pretty young to be in a big kid bed, for just the reason you mention — it’s tough for an 18 month old to practice the self-control necessary to stay in bed! However, I totally get your fears about him falling out of bed and REALLY getting hurt next time.
As for what to do – I’d recommend talking to your healthcare provider, and getting tips from him/her. I’ve known parents who’ve gone ahead with the transition, just for peace of mind – the thought there is that if the child is going to be getting in and out of bed anyway, you may as well embrace it, and make it safer, instead of trying to fight it. I’ve also known parents who’ve stuck with the crib, and tried to “wait it out” so to speak. Some kids will climb in and out of the crib a few times, but once the novelty wears off, or once they have a big (and scary) fall, they pretty much stop. That’s a temperament thing, though – depends SO much on personality, as to whether or not your son would do that.
Either way – whether you go to a bed, or whether you stick with the crib — you will want to carefully toddler-proof his room. I would even plan on bolting big furniture to the wall, or just getting rid of any tall, heavy pieces of furniture altogether.
Hope this helps, Angie! Thanks for reaching out to ask your questions – we’re always here to offer tips! 🙂
So, my son turns 18 months in about 2 weeks. Yesterday he was down for his nap and started crying. He was only down for about an hour and he usually naps for about 3. So, this being said, I usually let him cry a little bit and he usually soothes himself back to sleep. Except this time there was a huge THUD. I sprinted upstairs (and for a 9 week pregnant lady, it probably was more like a fast jog). There he was to greet me at his door bawling his face off. Now both my husband and I are freaking out if it will happen again and what we should do. My husband is worried he’ll do it again and fall in his neck and severely injure himself. So, for tonight we put him back in the crib and surrounded it with pillows and bean bags. I’m just not sure he’s ready to transition ( or maybe it’s just me). He’s getting into everything these days and am not sure he will have the control to stay in his bed. That being said, I also don’t want to risk him trying to kamikaze out the crib and risk seriously injuring himself. What does ” regularly” getting out of bed mean? Do I just wait until he falls out of bed again to call it “regular”? We are just so worried next time he’ll seriously injure himself. Any advice/ guidance is appreciated!!
@ Emily — rest assured that this is a totally normal problem. Totally, totally normal. However, I’m betting that the fact that it’s normal doesn’t make you feel any better about dealing with it!
It sounds to me like you’re doing the right thing here, by not engaging with your son when he gets up, and just steering him right back to bed. You could implement some consequences, like @Meagan mentions with the door idea. It would be best if the consequences were immediate and connected with bedtime, so the door idea works. You could also try taking a stuffed animal (or something else in his bed — blanket, book, etc.) away each time he gets up. You don’t have to implement consequences, of course, but that’s something to at least consider.
Let us know what ends up working, Emily! And thanks for commenting.
@ Meagan — thanks for weighing in, and for helping a fellow mom! One of my favorite things to see in the comments section of each article — parents helping other parents 🙂
@Emily I can’t remember where I saw this idea (parent hacks maybe?) but I think it could work for you? You take some duct tape, preferably in a color or pattern of your son’s choosing (but you could probably use a less perminant tape if you were worried about long term effects) and put tape on the floor marking with the door all the way open, 3/4 open, 1/2 open and 1/4 open. You explain to your son that when he goes to bed the door is open, but every time he gets out of bed, it moves to the next mark. So the 4th time he gets out of bed, the door closes for the night. Supposedly, the incentive of having the door open is enough to keep some kids in bed once they get the concept, and the tape gives a tangible illustration so they can understand what’s happening. It’s not a punishment, it’s just the rule of what happens to the door every night.
My son is still in a crib so we’ve never tried it (and anyway we have to keep the door closed, so it wouldn’t work) but if you have an open door at bedtime, it might be worth a try?
I came looking for this info – glad it is such a recent article! Our son is 2.5 years old, and has been sleeping in his “big boy bed” since about December. We had a second baby in November and thought it would be better to switch him to the big bed sooner than later so he wouldn’t feel like he was getting booted from the crib when she is ready for it. We went right to a twin bed, with a bed rail. He seems to like it, and sleeps well in it – once he is asleep. At first he wanted one of us to lie with him in the bed until he fell asleep (which we did). Then he did well with the tuck-in routine (stories, songs) and “check-ins” every 5-10 minutes, lots of praise if he stayed in his bed. But the past few nights he has been popping out of bed almost before we close the door behind us and following us out. We are trying to just put him back in bed with little comment or discussion, but even 1/2 hour of this makes me want to tear my hair out. My husband has been giving in and lying down with him after the millionth (or so it seems) time putting him back — I’m sure not a good idea but at that point we’re desperate. Any other suggestions that might help? I would be OK with him playing with his stuffed animals in bed or whatever if he can’t fall asleep for a while, but so far he can’t manage that.
@ Darcy H — excellent suggestions! Thanks for sharing these, Darcy; I know a lot of the parents who read our blog appreciate really hands-on, practical tips like these. 🙂
Our daughter decided at 18 months that she didn’t want to be in her crib anymore. She made this clear by screaming/crying whenever we tried to leave the room at night. Since we have never been of the “Cry-it-out” mindset, this was upsetting for all of us. We started sleeping on a single bed with her until she fell asleep and then setting up things so that she couldn’t fall out during the night. We also let her have her naps on the bed. But I was worried about her trying to climb out when she woke up. I had seen some Montessori info about sleeping on the floor and I was intrigued. The first time we put a single mattress on the floor, our daughter was elated! She loved being on her bed! The first week or so I stayed with her until she fell asleep but soon she was able to go to sleep by herself and didn’t once climb out of bed. In the morning she would wait until I came to get her but after about a month she started to come out in the morning after she had slept long enough. In the last four months she’s only climbed out of bed at night 3 times, usually because she was sick or upset about something. After putting her back and explaining that she wasn’t allowed to get out, she would stay put.
Some things we found that helped: Making the bed cozy with pillows, blankets and one or two special stuffed animals. Waiting until she fell asleep until leaving the room for the first little while (we moved to a new home during this time and it took a month before she was ready to fall asleep alone in her new room). Not having toys in her room (all her toys are part of our living space). Making it fun to have your bed on the floor!
@ Amruta — I’m so sorry to hear you’re struggling with this transition! You must be exhausted and overwhelmed at this point, and that’s understandable.
First, let me say that at 19 months old, your son doesn’t need to nurse during the night (and definitely not several times per night.) So it might be encouraging to you to know that this isn’t something you need to keep doing. He’s probably just waking out of habit at this point, because it’s something he’s always done.
The next step is to help him learn how to fall asleep on his own and stay asleep in his own bed. We have a free guide that can help you get started with that; you can access it here: http://www.babysleepsite.com/toddler-sleep-training-secrets-free-ebook/
Start with that, and if you still need help in getting your son to sleep well, you can contact us again to learn more about our other options.
Hope this proves helpful for you, Amruta! And hang in there; you can do it! 🙂
My son is 19 months old and we are still co-sleeping… and now we are struggling to do the transition…still wakes up couple of times to nurse…will he ever sleep in his own bed/crib…????? Help…!!!
@ Helene — your TENTH child?! Wow!! Thank you so, so much for chiming in with this excellent insight; clearly, you have a wealth of experience that the rest of us don’t. 🙂 I think you’re advice is solid, and obviously, it’s been developed through lots and LOTS of experience!
Thanks again for commenting, Helene!
I’m transitioning my tenth child from a crib to a toddler bed now. My advice is to wait for this move until your child is ready to drop the afternoon nap. When they are good and tired and primed for sleep at night, they tend to stay in the bed and sleep deeper. Dropping daytime naps on their own is a good sign they are ready for this big bedtime change!
@ Justina — thanks for weighing in and sharing this info! very helpful. I’d say as long as you carefully, carefully toddler-proof whatever room he’ll be sleeping in, it can work out just fine. And that’s neat, your idea of wanting to give him more freedom as a way to curb his tantrum-throwing!
Thanks for commenting, Justina. 🙂
My 12 month old is getting ready to transit. I want to give him the freedom to do it himself. Right now he has to throw a tantrum before I realize what he’s wanting. & if I’m feeding our daughter, he has to wait. If he has to wait then he starts throwing things. I’ve just been putting a small pallet in the floor for naps, and he goes down himself most of the time. I think giving him the same bedtime freedom will work out just fine.
@ Olivia — I’d say to try transitioning her to a crib first. 13 months is still pretty young to be in a big kid bed; we usually recommend holding off on transitioning from crib to bed until age 2, if possible.
Hope that helps! Thanks for commenting. 🙂
HELP!!!! I don’t know what to do, my daughter is 13 months old and sleeps mostly through the night(wakes up to nurse 2x) and sleeps in our bed right now. I would like to transition her to her own bed, but don’t know if I should put her in a crib or “big girl” bed? Having mixed feelings about both, but I can’t keep her in my bed forever, lol. Any advice moms?
@ Meagan — True. But still, good for you for thinking ahead! I’m a planner, too, so I totally understand that impulse. 😉
Thanks! We’re not quite ready yet, so we still have plenty of time to think about it.
@ Meagan — We’ve worked with some families who use Montessori beds, and I think that in general, we’ve found that they work for some families and not for others. Could be a trial-and-error thing on your part; you could start with that and see what happens. We’re planning to do an article on Montessori beds, although it’s scheduled for the fall. Now, given the comments we’ve had on this article, I’m wondering if maybe I should bump that up and write it sooner!
Of course, another option would be to buy (or borrow) a second crib. That worked well for us; my boys are only 19 months apart, so we had to have 2 cribs in the house for awhile.
Keep us posted on what you end up doing, Meagan! I know a lot of moms ask themselves the same questions that you’re asking yourself; so let us know what you end up deciding. 🙂 And thanks for commenting!