Facebook Top
Are you tired of one-size-fits-all advice? Yes! I need a personalized sleep solution.

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Emily DeJeu says:

    @ Lil — thanks for sharing your story in such detail! Very helpful. I agree that while it’s good to make yourself aware of what the “experts” have to say, it’s also good to be mindful about what needs to happen in your own house, in order to keep everyone sane and alive. 😉

    Glad to hear your little girl is sleeping better now, and that you’ve graduated from the swing! Thanks for commenting, Lil.

  2. Lil says:

    Where do I start, oh my. This is great advice based on common sense for the majority of people but in our house our DD dictated to us what would work or not. There was no compromise at all, no worrying about bad habits or even SIDS because there were only certain things that would work and that was IT. My DD, when she was a baby, responded to nothing except nursing, holding, and the swing. We read books to get pointers and tricks and tried everything we read, we shushed, rocked, bounced, walked, everything. Nothing ever worked except for me to nurse her to sleep and then hold her through her naps (if I even moved a muscle after she was asleep, even deep sleep, she immediately woke up screaming and I’d have to start all over again for a nap.) At night I dozed sitting up holding her for the first four months and then at four months a friend of the family heard I was losing my mind and gave us a swing to borrow. DD HATED to be put in it during the day and when she was awake, screamed and screamed and threw up all over herself. But at night it was different. Every night I would do my usual nurse her for four to six hours until she was finally in a deep enough sleep for me to move and then I would carefully get up and put her into the swing and turn it on. She would sleep for about three hours like that, then she’d get up and we’d have to do the four hour process again. Sometimes she’d go back to sleep enough that I could put her back into the swing, sometimes I just had to hold her afterward. She slept in that swing every night from the time she was four months old until she was a year old. She was swaddled (in a Woombie suit) and couldn’t get out. I used the straps/seatbelt and she was secure. For the whole first year of her life I got maybe 2-3 hours of sleep per day/night, and the ONLY time I got sleep after she turned four months old was when she was in the swing. I tried and tried to get her to sleep in other places, and to sleep on her own, fall asleep on her own, wean from the swaddle, but she would just scream and scream and get so upset that it took over an hour (or several hours) to calm her down again before we could even try to nurse her to sleep. When she was a year old she started to seem uncomfortable in the swing and so I bought an ebook from this site on how to sleep train her, because I needed to get rid of the swing, the swaddle, and get her to learn how to fall asleep on her own all at the same time and I was lost. She did OK, we’ve had setbacks but as a 2-year-old she can still put herself to sleep for naps and at night, even if it is still with a lot of screaming initially each time. The point of all of this is that without the swing I would have gotten absolutely NO sleep at all in the first year and that’s just not physically possible. And even then it was maybe 3 hours total, because up to a year old I still had to hold her for all of her naps so I couldn’t really sleep then either. I had people telling me I was “baby whipped” and I just needed to let her cry. SO I did, when she was 10 months old,because they were telling me she was beyond ready at that age, and so they’d get off my back, and she screamed and cried for hours and got so upset I was up all night with her because she couldn’t calm down after that. She just wasn’t ready for anything other way to sleep. While she cried it out, I went in and calmed her down periodically, checked on her, rubbed her back, all of that. It made no difference. She wailed hysterically. After that people left me alone about it. And back she went into the swing, by herself, every night, until she was a year old and started showing signs of being ready for something else. So that’s why, when I read this article I can appreciate the information because it is probably helpful for most of the babies out there, but mine wasn’t having ANY part of expert’s wisdom on how she was supposed to be sleeping. So we just did what worked and at night, that was the swing. I literally wouldn’t be here today if it hadn’t been for the swing.

  3. Emily DeJeu says:

    @ Adrianna — thanks so much for bringing up the reflux issue. That’s something I neglected to mention in the article, but you’re absolutely right — babies with reflux really do sleep better if they’re propped up at a slight angle!

    I think your point dovetails nicely with the point Casey made earlier — it’s important to follow safety guidelines, but only within reason. It seems like you did exactly the right thing here; your doctor directly advised you to sleep your son at a 45 degree angle, and you used the swing to do it. I think anytime a doctor who knows your child personally advises something that conflicts with a larger, more general recommendation by the AAP, your doctor’s recommendation should take priority. Sounds like that’s exactly what happened in your situation.

    Thanks for making this point, Adrianna, and for reminding us that babies with reflux really need to sleep in the swing, especially for those first few months.

  4. Adrianna says:

    My son was diagnosed at two weeks old with severe reflux(GERD). They said due to the severity to avoid dairy and soy proteins.. They also recommend have him sleep at a 45 degree angle.. We did everything we could.. We tried elevating his crib mattress, sleeping in his car seat, but found that our swing adjusted to the perfect angle for him to sleep.. He loved it.. I don’t know what we would have done those few months with out it.. We had to rotate between the crib and swing so he wouldn’t rely on it. But honestly when my next child arrives if he/she has same issue I will be allowing them to do the same.. Telling us it increases the risk of SIDS but also telling those parents to children with GERD issues to elevate them is hard to believe.. I ran a fan and a humidifier for the first 8 months for fear of SIDS.. Multiple recommendations all around from every doctor but none can tell you how your child will react to it.. Every child is different and my son needed his swing to get him past his worst reflux stages.. Most children out grow it by one but my son going on two still has it. Sometimes the perfect angle he finds today still matches his swing which is stored away since he out grew it..

  5. Emily DeJeu says:

    @ Casey — I think I understand your general point here, and I agree. Every parent needs to have boundaries when it comes to following safety precautions. Safety should be first, but there are limits, right? After all, if we put safety above all else, we’d probably never let our kids ride around in our cars, or be exposed to direct sunlight. 😉

    I totally understand that for some moms, using the swing for some night sleep is a must, if they’re going to maintain their sanity. I get that. I did that with all three of my kids from time to time, actually! It was never a regular thing, but there were times when I thought to myself, “If I don’t get a couple uninterrupted hours of sleep tonight, I might actually die.” And so into the swing they went!

    However, that’s not something we officially recommend here at the Baby Sleep Site. We stick closely to AAP recommendations when we advise the families we work with. And for that reason, putting babies into their infant swings at night isn’t something we recommend. We get that parents may do it from time to time, but it’s not something we’re going to advise.

    Hope this clarification helps. Thanks for speaking up, Casey, and for offering your insights! 🙂

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *