“Why does my baby wake up crying?”
That’s a question we hear a lot – and it’s the questions we’re answering in today’s quick tip article!
Why Your Baby Wakes Up Crying
Well, for starters, your baby may obviously wake up crying sometimes due too the need to eat (hunger is a powerful motivator!). Additionally, your baby may wake up with a wet or dirty (or leaky) diaper, or may wake up because he’s too hot or cold. These are all perfectly reasonable reasons for a baby to wake up – and they’re all reasons that mom and dad need to address, either by feeding or changing baby.
A bit less straightforward is the fact that many babies wake up due to their sleep associations. Some sleep associations are pretty straightforward causes of crying upon waking – for example, if your baby’s pacifier falls out, she may very well be pretty frustrated that she can’t put it back in, and that may lead to tears!
But some other sleep associations are less easy to spot as the cause of crying upon waking. If you normally rock or nurse your baby to sleep, she may cry when she wakes up because she’s no longer moving and/or sucking. Similarly, if you typically hold your baby for sleep, he may cry if he wakes up in his crib and is no longer being held.
Beyond these reasons, though, here’s something to remember: we all wake up briefly between sleep cycles from time to time. Our babies are no different. Sometimes, your baby may wake slightly and cry between sleep cycles. This is often the cause of those weird 2 minute crying spells that you sometimes might hear in the middle of the night, or during a nap. Do you know what I mean? Those times when you hear a cry, but by the time you’re up and moving toward baby, he’s already fallen back to sleep? The cause there is just brief waking during sleep cycles that happens to be accompanied by some fussing.
That goes hand-in-hand with the next point: for some children, waking up crying is a sign that they aren’t really done sleeping yet, and need more rest. We suspect this has something to do with temperament – while some babies might wake too early from sleep and be fairly quiet and content, others will just wail. This was the case for Nicole:
“With my first-born, if he woke up crying, it 90% of the time meant that he was not done sleeping. He may have awakened in between sleep cycles and had trouble going into the next one.”
In these cases, it’s sometimes best to wait a minute or two when you hear crying that you suspect is just waking between sleep cycles – sometimes, your baby will go right back to sleep. Or, even if you ultimately to go in to comfort your baby, you’ll know that the goal should be to help baby get back to sleep, because she isn’t fully rested yet.
Finally, keep in mind that some babies (and toddlers, for that matter) cry after waking even if they’re fully rested. Some babies will wake up from a marathon nap crying, or will wake after a long night of peaceful sleep just wailing. In these cases, the problem is most likely that the child just needs a bit of time to fully wake up. (Heck, I know adults like this – I’m one of them, in fact!! 😉 I don’t wake up crying, but boy, do I need plenty of time and space to fully wake up!) In these cases, you can try simply cuddling your child, or offering a small snack or a favorite toy, and allowing your child to slowly wake up.
So, in short, if your baby often wakes up crying, you’ll want to evaluate the reasons. If it’s not something that requires immediate attention, like hunger of an uncomfortable diaper or illness, then evaluate whether or not it may be a sleep association. To do that, you’ll want to think about how your child falls asleep (in your arms, in the rocker?), and then compare that to how your child is waking up (in the crib, alone?). Finally, keep in mind that temperament makes a difference, too – it may just be that crying is one way that your child lets you know he’s not done sleeping, or it may be that your kiddo is one who needs to wake up slowly, and is going to fuss a bit while he does it! 😉
Does your baby wake-up crying? What do you think the reason is? Have questions about crying upon waking? Scroll down to ask questions, to share insights, and to hear from other parents just like you!
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Please help! My 6 month old daughter has never slept through the night. She used to wake up every few hours to eat when she was 0-3 months old. Then she would wake up every hour. Now, she wakes up every 20-30 minutes crying. All I have to do is put the pacifier in her mouth and she rolls over and goes to sleep. If I don’t put the pacifier in her mouth, she stays awake and starts screaming. Have I created a terrible dependency in my child? I’ve tried sleep training, but no method has worked (CIO, Ferber, modified Ferber). Please help! She’s a great napper during the day, but nighttimes are very hard and my baby and I both need some sleep. Thank you!
Hi @Kendra – Thanks for writing to us, and sorry to hear that you’ve been struggling with your 6 month old’s sleep! We know how tough it can be when baby is waking and crying so often! It does sound like she “needs” that pacifier to fall asleep/back to sleep, and replacing it every 20-30 minutes sounds brutal! You may want to check out this article that we wrote, about when and how to wean from the pacifier:
https://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/pacifier-weaning-stop-baby-toddler-how-when/
If things don’t smooth out, please consider talking with one of our expert sleep consultants. You can check out our email and email + phone options here:
https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-toddler-sleep-consulting-services/
Hang in there Kendra!!!
My 11.5 month old has been a good napper- he was taking two naps a day for about an hour and 20 minutes. For the past week or so, he has woken up from his naps after only sleeping about 25-35 minutes and he’s usually crying. He sometimes will go back to sleep for another 10 minutes, but usually not. And he usually cries for a minute or two when put down, which he never did before. I don’t really feel like he’s ready for only one nap a day but I’m not sure what else could be going on. The only other consideration is that he has no teeth, but it looks like a couple are about to pop through.
Hi Cari,
Thanks for visiting The Baby Sleep Site! I’m sorry to hear your baby has been waking up crying. Based on your description and his age, my best guess is that you’re dealing with the 12 month sleep regression. Not all babies go through this one, but both of mine did, and from the outside it looks like your baby just drops one or both naps for no reason for a couple of weeks. We actually have an article with some info on this regression that I hope will help here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-naps-2/12-month-olds-one-nap-transition/
Hang in there, and let us know if you need any further help!
My 13 month old son has only rarely woken up happy. I used to think that he’d outgrow it and would eventually wake up happy and content like all the other babies I have heard about, now I’m not sure. Although he tends to be less fussy after his two daytime naps he still wakes up crying most of the time. It’s hardest in the mornings when even after a good night’s rest (he tends to wake once between 5 or 6). He falls asleep on his own with a pacifier and blanket in his pack-and-play for naps and bedtime.
There was one week when he was about 7 months that he woke up happy every morning. It was wonderful! He would play with his blanket or a toy for 15 – 30 minutes while my husband and I talked and got ready for the day. Waking to the sound of screaming every morning instead of baby babble and singing is becoming almost unbearable. He’s a happy baby most of the time so that makes it even harder.
We aren’t sure what to do. At my husband’s suggestion I we are waiting longer to go to him and this morning he seemed to do a little better. Is there anything else we can do? I just want my son to wake up happy.
Hi @Emily, thank you for writing to us. I’m sorry to hear your son is waking up crying so often! I was going to suggest the same as your husband – to see if waiting a bit for him to wake up on his own and see if that helps (or if he wasn’t actually done sleeping and was going to fall asleep a bit more). I know how challenging that can be though, so hang in there. I am glad he is happy generally the rest of the time, he may just really not be a morning person. I know a lot of adults that while they’re not screaming and crying every day, I know they need their space for like 15-30 minutes before they’re really ready to be engaged and “go” for the day. Hang in there and if you find something that works for you please let us know!
My son is 2 and never has he woken up happy , from around 4 am every day since birth it’s the same crying !! I’m shattered he’s not any of the things above in the articalas I’m up in the night every night changing nappies ect !
He’s just a grumpy ass . Sorry to say it’s a thing no one can sort but age
Hi @Kevagh – Thanks for writing and we’re so sorry to hear that your son wakes up crying, and sorry to hear about those 4am wakings too! That is so tough! Since this has been happening for quite a while and you’re not sure what is causing this, I’d recommend checking out our VIP Members Area, which gives you access to all of our e-Books as well as audio tele-seminar recordings, case studies, and do-it-yourself tutorials, including a workbook designed to help you create your own sleep plan. My favorite feature is the access to our weekly “members only” expert chat sessions, where one of our sleep consultants will answer your specific questions live via chatroom! You can also write a message on any of the pages within the VIP Area, and a Sleep Consultant will reply!
The Members Area subscription is very affordable, and available in sizes to fit every budget. Members also receive 20% off of all personalized sleep consultation services, should you find that you would like more personalized assistance.
You can read more about our Members Area here:
https://www.babysleepsite.com/diy
Hang in there Kevagh! If you need any assistance at any time, please contact us!
I have a 6 week old and I want to help him join his sleep cycles and ultimately sleep longer chunks between feeds. He started by waking every 1-2 hours but in the last week has managed 3. He has friends the same age already doing 4-5 hours with a dream feed at 11 and then only one wake up. Is there anything I can do to help the transition? In the day I put him down awake and he gets to sleep on his own mostly, but sometimes falls asleep on my lap after a feed. I tent not to pay or rock him to sleep to avoid any sleep associations . In the night I usually wake when he starts stirring and snorting but I wait till he cries out before feeding. Should I time 2 mins of crying before picking him up? I only change his nappy if he soils it and leave wet ones so as not to fully wake him. Please help! I want to get things right this time round and give him and me the best possible sleep.
Hi @Sarah Hill, congratulations on your new baby! There is a lot going on in these early weeks so hang in there and try your best to not compare him to your friends children because all babies are so different. Here is a link to a free guide with tips for new parents: https://www.babysleepsite.com/15-free-baby-sleep-facts-new-parents-must-know/
We also have an ebook you would probably be interested in that covers newborn sleep through the first year, and is all about establishing good habits like you mentioned. Here is the link: https://www.babysleepsite.com/essential-keys-to-your-newborns-sleep/
If you need more help, let us know! We have a ton of resources that can help you as your baby grows and changes. 🙂
Hello, my 7 month old boy was sleeping 6-8 hour stretches at night in his own crib at 2-3 months. After his 4 month sleep regression, we moved him into a bed in his room with us, just to get any sleep. Now it’s a habit. He wakes up about 6 times a night just to eat. I don’t want to deny my baby food, but he wakes ever 1 hour to two hours and most recently ever hour to every half an hour. He’s a terrible napper! We’re lucky if he goes to an hour most days. Overall a pretty happy child during the day. We’ve tried letting him cry it out a bit with a controlled crying method, and have been trying recently to put him back in his crib. I have a bed in his room, where I sleep and as soon as I go in there to sleep in the bed though, he wakes up to be in bed with me, and continues to wake up frequently in the night.
Hi @Ariel – Thanks for writing, and I am sorry that things have been so tough since your baby turned 4 months! We understand, and you’re not alone! It sounds like you’ve got a plan, and keep sticking with it!! Perhaps a little white noise to help him not hear you come in may help, if you do not have any white sound in his room. Good luck Ariel and please contact us if you would like assistance getting him to fall asleep and back to sleep on his own!
Hi, my 17 months old cries between most of her sleep cycles. sometimes she needs us in the room with her asking for water, she goes back to sleep quickly after sipping on the water. and sometimes she just cries and settles herself back to sleep. but she wakes up us anyway. for the bedtime routine, she goes to sleep at about 7:30 at nights. and has 1hour 20mins sleep at the mid-day. I changed her bedtime routine from 7 to 7:30 recently because she used to wake up happily at about 2 am and didn’t go back to sleep for one hour.
we are very sleep deprived as a reason for her crying and waking us at nights. She is usually a happy kid, it’s just nights.
Hi @Sue, thanks for writing to us. I’m so sorry to hear your little one has been having difficulty transitioning between sleep cycles. Here is a free guide with tips to help your baby sleep through the night that may help provide some additional things to try: https://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-through-night-free-ebook/
I do think that if you need more help your family would greatly benefit from working one-on-one with our team of amazing sleep consultants. They could look at the full sleep history and see if there is something else going on here that you may not have considered, and will suggest some schedule changes if they thing that is a contributor (just like you’ve been experimenting with the change in bedtime). Here is a link to read more about our personalized services: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-toddler-sleep-consulting-services/
I hope this helps! Please feel free to contact us directly anytime if you have any more questions to contact@babysleepsite.com
My 4 month old sleeps well during the night. She goes down around 7:30 and is up around 7 ( waking once or twice in the night to eat and be changed). But she only naps for 40mins at a time. I know her sleep cues and she is able to put herself to sleep but she can’t seem to transition into her second sleep cycle. She cries very hard. I can usually get her back down by holding and rocking her but she only sleeps for another10-15mins. What should i do? Let her cry?
@Siobhan – Thank you for reading and for sharing with us. Lengthening naps can be confusing and exhausting, especially when your attempt leads to short results, I know. There are many methods you can try to lengthen her naps depending on what you’re comfortable with. Check out this article for 25 tips for lengthening naps: https://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/25-baby-toddler-nap-time-tips/ If you find you need/would like more support, consider connecting with one of our lovely sleep consultants who can walk you through this process. You can learn more about them here:https://www.babysleepsite.com/about Hang in there, Siobhan!
Hi my baby is 5 months old, since i can remember when i put him to sleep,which is me holding and feeding him to sleep, he cries alot with his eyes shut, also when i put him on his crib, the first two hours 3-5 times he cries alot with his eyes shut after the two hours his normally fine in deep sleep which he only till about 5am then then the same happens again every
30 mins i have to wake up with him as he cries. Then 6:30-7am he wakes up for good and his smiling and energetic he just wants to play, he has 3-4 short naps during the day. Day time his fine, its just the at night we hardly get any sleep and we haven’t been getting for about 4 months, was wondering if there is anyway we can change this or if we are doing something wrong.
Hi @Glorian, thanks for sharing what’s been happening with your son with us. I’m so sorry to hear you’ve been struggling! Here is a link to download a free guide which will give you tips to help your baby sleep through the night: https://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-through-night-free-ebook/
I will mention that 1-2 wake ups are normal at this age, so don’t feel like he has to sleep straight through, but I’m sure you’d gladly welcome 1-2 wake ups compared to what’s happening now. If you need help working through this, let us know. We have a team of highly trained sleep consultants that would love to help walk through this with you should your family decide you want the support. You can read more about our personalized options on our website here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-toddler-sleep-consulting-services/
Hang in there!
My 17 month wakes every morning crying his eyes out. We’ve asked the pediatrician for help and we’re always told “it’s a phase”. However he’s done this for as long as I can remember which makes me doubt the “phase” advice. He normally goes to bed at 7, he does not stir or wake during the night, but he wakes up every morning around 5:30/5:45 (like clock work) screaming. He typically takes a 1.5 – 2.5 hr nap every day too. We’ve put a night light in his room and he sleeps with a blankie. We’ve tried letting him “cry it out” but because of his temperament that just seems to escalate things. When we tend to him he’s immediately fine. I’d describe him as “needier” than my first child in the sense he wants to be held all the time, expresses his discomfort with anything and everything and seems to be happiest when he’s around people.
I can remember one time in the last 17 months that he hasn’t woken up screaming. He does this with every nap too although at day care they say he doesn’t do this at all. Needless to say it’s exhausting and a painful way to start every day. Any advice would be greatfully appreciated.
Hi @Carrie – Thank you for writing! As Nicole writes in this article, you will want to figure out if he is still tired and needs more sleep, or if this is just the way that he wakes and calls for you! Since he does not do this at day care, it is possible that this is just his “routine” when he is awake and ready for you to come and get him. Some babies do have a tougher time waking up! Perhaps though he is still tired and needs more sleep, and this schedule can help guide you too:
https://www.babysleepsite.com/schedules/toddler-schedule/
I hope that things do smooth out and that the tips in the article and here are helpful! Good luck Carrie, and do let us know if you would like more help with this!
I have a 7.5 month old who we sleep trained around 5 months. She can go to bed on her own for naps and at bedtime but at night she has been waking up screaming for atleast an hour. We have weened her off night feedings so I know she’s not hungry. We have tried everything to create an optimal sleep environment such as sound machines, blackout shades, weighted sleep sacks, and ideal temperatures but nothing has worked. She has been on a good bedtime routine for months now which we have stayed very consistent with. At night when she cries, I don’t pick her up from the crib and I try and soothe her while she is in th crib but that doesn’t work. After an hour of crying in thmy crib I pick her up to soothe her but that doesn’t always work either. Eventually she falls asleep after 1.5 hours, sometimes while she is in the crib, other times while I’m holding her. I have also sent my husband in but that seems to make things worse. We are at our wits end and need a solution! Any idea of what the cause could be??
Hi Kim,
Thank you for using The Baby Sleep Site as a resource! I’m so sorry to hear you’re dealing with these long periods of night waking – it sounds exhausting! If you’ve already ruled out a health concern, the number one reason for long night waking like this is a scheduling issue – she may be napping too much, too little, or her naps may be spaced incorrectly. We have a sample 8 month-old schedule you canr reference here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/schedules/8-month-old-baby-schedule/
Or you can work with a sleep consultant directly for more help, either with a consultation package, or via our Members Area. I hope this helps – best of luck!
Hi, my baby is 13 weeks old today and has been crying very loudly (almost screaming sometimes) for a few seconds in her sleep for several days now. She doesn’t open her eyes. At first it was a few times in the night and now it is every 30-40 minutes and then every 5-10 minutes at around 5am, at which point I wake her up because it’s so upsetting. She has been waking up around 5:45am for the last several weeks. Her bedtime for the last several weeks is between 6:30 and 8:00ish and she will sleep through the night until 5-6:30am without any feedings if bedtime is closer to 8:00. She has been consolidating her afternoon nap lately to 1.5 hrs from her usual 30-45 minute nap but again cries after 30-40 minutes while asleep. Prior to her consolidation, she was taking a 30-45 minute nap about every 2 hours (sometimes less than 2 hours depending on cues), but almost always waking up crying and when I would go to her she didn’t seem totally awake so I started letting her fuss a few minutes about 2 weeks ago and she has been putting herself back to sleep. I usually rock her to drowsy then put her down for her naps in her Snoo (electric bassinet, which I lock at the lowest setting). Lately she has been fighting me rocking her for naps and bedtime and screams so I just hold her to my chest vertically almost diagonally and shift my weight side to side then put her down awake if she doesn’t get drowsy. She also hasn’t been giving me much of any sleep cue lately. At night she sometimes falls asleep nursing and I don’t wake her because she has/had reflux and I have to wait 30 minutes to put her down after eating. If she wakes up by herself before the 30 minutes, I try to rock her to sleep (not to drowsy), but she’s been fighting me/screaming. Any help determining what to do about her “night wakings” and soothing is greatly appreciated.
@Aly – Thank you for reading and for sharing with us. I’m sorry you’ve been having a time with your daughter crying out in her sleep. This type of behavior can sometimes be normal but can otherwise be caused by a number of things. We don’t have enough details from you to give you an accurate suggestion though. You should consider connecting with one of our sleep consultants who can help you further once she has more information. You can read more about our ladies here:https://www.babysleepsite.com/about You can read more about helping babies with reflux sleep here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/baby-infant-reflux-gerd-sleep-better-tips/ Hang in there, Aly!