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Do you want more sleep?   Yes! I need more sleep.

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  1. Hollie says:

    I also feel like a method like this is tantamount to neglect and abuse! If your newborn is sleeping through the night on their own that is one thing, but to force such a young and helpless baby to go without the feedings they need is nothing but starving your own child. I completely agree with the comment that if you cannot sacrifice some sleep for your newborn baby for at least a few months, you need to think about why you became a parent. In fact, you really shouldn’t be a parent. And if your day is so busy with your other children that you would use this sort of training on a newborn, you should not have so many children. My response may seem overly empassioned to some, but take it from someone who had to go through years of work and heartache to become a mother, having children is a privilege that too many peolple take for granted.

    • Emily DeJeu says:

      @ Hollie – agreed! It’s just way too extreme a method to recommend to the general public, and it does not take into account AT ALL a mom’s breast milk supply and breastfeeding goals.

      Thanks for commenting, Hollie!

  2. cindy says:

    Hi,
    My daughter is 26, not a bub anymore but will always be my bub.
    When she was born I was strongly encouraged to get her into a routine of feeding and sleeping that suited me by the mid wives and nursing staff. Of course I complied, after all, what did I know. The facts are as follows.
    My daughter did sleep through the nights at about 2 month. My breast milk did slowly dry up, but what was most distressing was that my daughter was being malnourished.
    Despite my concerns and regular check ups, I was assured everything was as it should be.
    I took matters into my own inexperienced hands and sought another opinion.
    My little girl was in fact underweight. Matters were rectified immediately and my baby put on weight rapidly.
    My point is, babies need nourishment. They grow so quickly in the first few months. In order to develop most effectively they need regular feeds.
    Take what you want from this experience. I work as a private nanny and have done so for over 12 years now, and I would never recommend encouraging a little baby to sleep through the night. To me, its tantamount to neglect. But these are my thoughts only. After all…what would I know.

    • Emily DeJeu says:

      @ cindy – thanks so much for sharing your opinion with us! As a mom of a grown daughter, your wisdom is so valuable, and so appreciated by our community of young moms 🙂

      Best to you and to your family!

  3. Christine Hahn says:

    I am an exclusively breastfeeding mom. I believe in demand feeding and never waking a sleeping baby after 6pm for feeds. My first child slept through from 10 weeks (10 hour stretches), and never fed more often than 3 – 4 hourly during the day. My second slept through from 5 weeks (9 – 11 hours), but unfortunately started waking 3 times at night after 12 weeks. We are down to 1-2 wakings now (5 months). I do have very good milk supply and storage capacity. I also know a mother that tried to enforce a feeding schedule and distract her hungry baby for hours on end – she ended up with low milk supply and a baby that failed to thrive and never slept.

  4. Emma says:

    The thing that worries me most is that there will be inexperienced first time mums who will take the word of these “experts” as gospel, potentially at the expense of their childs and their own well being. That’s really sad.

  5. Angela says:

    Reading about this new method of ‘teaching’ a newborn to sleep for 8 hours makes me sad. A newborn cannot learn to put themselves back to sleep, they are simply being denied breastmilk or formula and ignored or distracted so they give up from sheer exhaustion and fall alseep. This is in my opinion neglect, and could even be considered abuse. The baby will suffer greatly physically and mentally. The role of mum and dad is to protect, nurture and love their baby, and denying them their basic right to milk neglects these rights. Following such incredibly bad advice would make bonding with your baby difficult and the whole newborn phase much more stressful than it should be. The authors of this book should be discredited by paediatricians and experts in the field to encourage parents to stay away from these quacks. Love, nurture and feed your baby and the sleep will follow when the child is developmentally ready and no longer requiring the calories and hydration as well as comfort, night time feeding brings.

    • @Angela Thank you for chiming in with your feelings!

  6. Janetta says:

    Hi. It’s clear from comments here & from my own experiences & what I’ve heard from other mothers/parents, that everyone has a unique experience in some ways. But there are of course things in common, ‘universal’ baby experiences too. My experience was a baby who breast fed every 1.5 – 2 hours from early days until around 5-6 months. This was comfortable for my baby & necessary for her to thrive. At times she herself would try to take in a little more than usual in one sitting, after which she would promptly throw it all up. So clearly tummy capacity is little in the early days & you can’t ‘make’ or “encourage” your baby to eat more in one go & then not offer milk when they’re clearly crying for it 2 hours later – & it makes me really angry when people/professionals (so called), tell you this is possible or desirable for every baby! Really really gets me steamed! I know my comments may seem biased, but this has been our family’s experience & we have a beautiful thriving happy baby who is 17 months old now. At one point I just stopped listening to all those who insisted she shouldn’t need to eat this often & therefore sleep ‘better’. Well this just wasn’t our experience & not what our daughter needed. I think it borders on the cruel & neglectful to allow a young baby to cry for food & withhold it. I found going with what seemed natural for our baby & tempering this with broader family needs to be the best way. Yes there were sleepless nights, but this to me is all part of the awesome privelege of raising a little human being. I found the baby sleep site invaluable for setting up sleep plans for our daughter, making adjustments as she grew & developed & breast feeding as long as she wanted to (in our case that was 6.5 months, then I express fed to 8 months & then gradually switched to formula). I just want to encourage other mothers & parents out there – you are doing a wonderful & important job; baby’s needs & schedules change all the time, you can get good help with sleep training/coaching/sleep planning), but don’t feel pressured to resort to extreme measures that just don’t seem right for your baby or family. Let go of guilt, stress about you “should do it this way” & shut out whatever seems like crazy talk to you. The Baby Sleep Site is fantastic for giving sound professional, unbiased & compassionate advice, to help your baby & you get more & better rest as he/she grows. Just reading & taking advantage of free resources is an option too – I did that a lot. Thank you Baby Sleep Site, you guys do an awesome job & parents the world over thank you!

  7. Jen says:

    Nash, while I agree with you as far as newborns are concerned, it is not just “social” pressures that require a mother to be up and running as soon as her baby is born. There is simply no other choice when you have more than one child (or a job to go back to right away). I do remember being able to relax and lay around w/my first newborn, but now I have a newborn, 2 year old, and 3 year old, and there is not a moment to sit down during the day. While I BF my newborn on demand, sleep training for our family may become a necessity in a few months.

    I think feeding a newborn on demand is important in the beginning, but after a few months you just do what you have to do to survive!

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