4 Month Old Sleep Regression Explained (sometimes 3 months too)
Posted by Nicole on July 15th, 2008
Countless parents come for help with their 4 month old’s sleep. Why? This article will explain why “good” sleepers sometimes turn “bad” around the 3 or 4 month old mark.
How newborn baby sleeps in the early weeks
When a newborn falls asleep, she immediately goes into deep sleep (also known as REM sleep, but I will avoid too much technical talk because that’s one reason I made this website, so you won’t have to learn the whole history of sleep if you don’t want to (or can’t stay awake to!)). If you are interested in knowing more about our biological rhythms and how we do sleep in more detail, I highly recommend the book, Solve Your Child’s Sleep Problems). Newborns spend a lot of their time in deep sleep, which is why it is hard to wake them up (even to eat!) in those early days.
4 month old sleeps (and sometimes as early as 3 months or as late as 5 months)…
We all go in and out of light and deep sleep. As adults, we might change positions, look at the clock, or reposition our pillow. Up until now, you may have rocked your baby or simply given him a pacifier and he slept for hours without waking up. Well, at 3 or 4 months old, your baby is now sleeping more like an adult. Now when she falls asleep, instead of entering deep sleep, she enters lighter sleep, first. That’s why if you help her fall asleep, then put her down, she is likely to wake up because she isn’t in her deep sleep, yet.
4 month olds enter deep sleep…
Initially in the night, your 4 month old will enter deep sleep relatively quickly, within 30 minutes (this changes as we get older). However, as I said, we all cycle in and out of light and deep sleep. A child’s sleep cycle is about 45-50 minutes. So, your baby will briefly awake 45-50 minutes after she has been asleep. To put that in perspective, if you are holding your baby to sleep, you would need to hold her for at least 30 minutes to make sure she’s in deep sleep and then she might wake up 15 minutes later. Sound familiar?
Overall, though, your baby’s deepest sleep is in the early part of the night, so after that first sleep cycle, she might sleep just fine for a few hours. So, you’re golden right? Just hold her for an hour? Nope!
4 month old sleeps the rest of the night…
The technical definition of “sleeping through the night” is 5 hours of continuous sleep (i.e. no feedings) and many babies can/will do this by 2 or 3 months old. The beginning of the night is your baby’s deepest sleep and after the first 5 hours (if not sooner, depending on just how challenging he is), he will cycle between light and deep sleep, but not as deep as the beginning of the night. This is where the problem of sleep associations really come into play. If your baby needs your help to go to sleep in the beginning of the night, sometime after midnight or so, he will continue to need your help every 1 or 2 sleep cycles (that means every 45 to 90 minutes or as I often hear, every 1-2 hours).
Between 4-6 a.m., approximately, is the lightest sleep of the whole night (parents’ complaints alone make this true, in my experience, aside from my reading). In the very early morning hours (about 30 minutes to an hour before waking up), he will again go into the very deep sleep.
Although babies commonly wake up early, be sure it is truly their waking up time and not just this lighter sleep and that they are having trouble sleeping. You might notice they want a “nap” just 30 or so minutes after “waking up”. What you experienced was a night waking, not starting the day.
4 month old sleep regression
You might have heard about the 4 month sleep regression and wonder if your baby will go back to sleeping well. Some parents will be one of the lucky few whose baby will go back to sleeping well in 2-4 weeks, however, not all of us will be that lucky. For example, I find that babies who need a pacifier to sleep where you are replacing it many times per night do not stop needing that pacifier to sleep. You might get lucky and not have to replace it 10 times (maybe “just” 3-4), but maybe not. It is usually better to solve the root of the problem than to hope you are one of the lucky ones. So, maybe wait a few weeks, but if things aren’t better, plan to make changes. I talk to parents of 8 month olds and even 20 months old who are still waiting for their “baby” to grow out of their sleep problems.
4 month olds sleeping through the night…
How can you help your 4 month old sleeping through the night? Read this website (free article updates via e-mail is a good choice), be sure to check out my free guide, 5 Ways to Help Your Child Sleep Through the Night and/or get a detailed step-by-step baby sleep guide, which includes e-mail baby sleep consultations, to answer all those “what if?” questions.
Share your 4 month old’s sleep story!
Tags: 4 month, 4 month babies, 4 month baby, 4 month development, 4 month infant, 4 month old, 4 month old baby sleep, 4 month old sleep, 4 month old sleep regression, 4 month old sleep schedule, 4 month sleep, 4 month sleep pattern, 4 month sleep regression, 4 month sleep schedule, baby sleep, sleep cycles
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March 29th, 2009
Sounds very interesting and soooo familiar. I am looking for any reasonable advise that explain the sleepless nights and frequent waking. If I can establish a regular sleep pattern that would be best. Thanks for the advise.
April 11th, 2009
The best thing for me is ROUTINE, ROUTINE, ROUTINE. My 4 month old sleeps 10 hours at night from 9pm to 7am. During the day she’s on an eat, play, sleep schedule and I’ve gotten her on a 3-4 hour feeding schedule. To me, the trick is to make sure that they are full, not just satisfied. I let her tell me when she’s done eat (pushing the bottle away or falling asleep.) I let her play after she eats. When I see her yawn or rub her face I put her in her crib immediately. She’ll normally “talk” or whine for 5-10 minutes and then she sleeps for a good 2-3 hours at a time before we repeat the process. At night, we give her a bath using the lavender bedtime wash, then give her a baby massage with the lavender bedtime lotion, put on a fresh diaper and some pajamas, read a book, give her a bottle and when she’s finished we put her in her crib. She normally goes right to sleep without a pacifier or even “talking” and will be out for 10 hours. I may just have a good baby, but I believe that Routine is KEY. I hope that maybe this helps to see what other moms are doing!
GOOD LUCK!!
April 16th, 2009
@Ali You’re welcome!
July 21st, 2009
My baby is 4 month-old and she will fall asleep and the next moment she will wake up screaming “blue murder” tears running and everything!
Can you tell me why this happens and how can i help her to get throug thise?
July 22nd, 2009
Hi, my baby is 3.5months and I had the screaming blue murder episode the other night and was shocked and worried. Checked her temperature, fine. I ended up having to give her some milk beofre she settled again. My health visitor reckons it was colic. I’ve made sure I’v winded her really well since and I haven’t had a repeat. Saying that though I can’t her to sleep on her own without rocking her in my arms!
July 22nd, 2009
Sorry I also meant to say try infacol, gripe water or colief. Infacol is working for me.
August 7th, 2009
@Melissa You didn’t say how she is falling asleep, but if you are helping her fall asleep, you want to let her learn to fall asleep on her own. If you read my article about sleep associations, she is most likely waking up because she is not in the same environment that she fell asleep. Imagine if you fall asleep in your bed and wake up on the couch. You’d freak out too. I hope that makes sense! Here is the article about sleep associations: http://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/sleep-association/
August 7th, 2009
@Kate I think it’s pretty rare for colic to suddenly appear after 3 1/2 months. You generally see it start much sooner. We all have off nights once in awhile, so if that was the only time, I wouldn’t worry about it. Thank you for commenting and sharing infacol and gripe water!
September 12th, 2009
We also have a routine with our 4 month old, but it does us no good. Just over a week ago, her nighttime sleep fell apart, and it’s been getting much worse every night. She fell asleep at 7 pm after 30 minutes of trying and was up again at 8. We have been trying for the past 1 1/2 hours to get her back to sleep by rocking her. She’ll sleep in our arms for 30 minutes but then wake up about 2 minutes after we put her in the crib. Tonight will probably be worse than any of the past nights. (She’s normally been up about 8-9 times a night. She won’t cry herself to sleep–and she doesn’t show any signs of sickness or discomfort.
She used to put herself to sleep and sleep through the night. Nothing prepared us for this change! We’re at our wits’ end!
September 18th, 2009
@CvZ (((HUGS))) You are definitely not alone. Please read up on sleep associations here: http://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/sleep-association/ The key is to help her learn to fall asleep unassisted. Good luck!
September 21st, 2009
Nicole, thank you for the wealth of experiential knowledge you have passed on. My son, Nathan is 4mnths old. He started to wake 2 hrly at night crying and my evauation was that he was hungry ( was also in line with 16 wk growth spurt). This is now (a problem- as you would say) I bought a copy of ‘healthy sleep habits, happy baby’ by weissbluth at yr recommendation and have instituted ‘cry it out’. I did this when my 13 yr old was 10mnths. It was worse this time but I did it and he still loves me. He only fed twice last night between 6:15pm and 6am. Can I ask why you have in yr 4mnth routine, feeding 2hrly and not 3/4hrly? Is it because they r likely to have shorter naps bcause of sleep changes at 4mnths and u want to stick to feed, play, sleep pattern? I’m using the routine at the moment and he seems to fit it well.
Thanks again you are an angel!
Natalie
September 25th, 2009
@Natalie You’re very welcome and I’m glad you found a solution with your 4 month old! Yes, I was trying to stick to the eat, play, sleep routine, but many babies will vary in how long they can go. In my naps book I try to provide more variety. It will also depend on whether the baby is breastfeeding or formula feeding sometimes, too. My boys ate every 2 hours for quite awhile (I breastfed) but I know many babies can go 3-4 hours from early on. They are all just so different.
October 20th, 2009
My baby hardly ever would sleep! He is three months now and his first strech of sleep he can usually make it to 4 and half to five hours. It has helped me greatly to not put him to bed to soon, I feed him and rock him to sleep. Sometimes I would be putting him down to early and he would cry.
Another thing that is working really well is pushing him around in the stroller till he falls asleep and he will just sleep their till he wakes up!
November 6th, 2009
@Heather That’s great! I’m glad you found what works for him.
Continued luck to you.
November 7th, 2009
My baby’s sleep fell apart at 17 weeks, and it seemed to happen quite suddenly…
He had colic as a small baby, and used to really come unglued at 6 pm. We would settle him to sleep by about 7 and he would sleep until at least 2 or 3 am. I would feed him and he’d sleep again until 6- so lucky!!! He started to wake up more often, maybe 3 or 4 times a night. We have a bedtime routine ( bath, massage, jammies, lights out, breastfeed, back rub, crib). Now we are able to just put him in his crib, awake, no pacifier, and he will just chat a bit and go to sleep on his own (yay!). However, now he wakes up at LEAST every 2 hours- beginning at 9 pm. I have tried to let him sort it out himself and see if he’s not really “awake” but no way. I have tried the “hush, hush” from the side of the crib, and patting and touching him, but he will not settle unless I pick him up. Once he is settled (sometimes requires breastfeeding, sometimes just a cuddle) I can put him back in his crib and he will go back to sleep himself, only to wake an hour and a half later.
This has been going on now for 3 weeks, and I am exhausted. Am I doing something wrong? HELP!
November 22nd, 2009
@Karen It sounds like you’re doing a lot of right things, so I’d probably need more detail. I’m assuming he’s no longer swaddled and bedtime is still early such that he’s not over-tired. Once you do pick him up, do you make sure he goes back down awake? It sounds like he is just having trouble going BACK to sleep. My son mastered going TO sleep much sooner than BACK to sleep, too. Just keep trying. Some “get it” sooner than others. Hang in there and good luck!
December 8th, 2009
I have a 3 and half month old daughter. she does get 3-4 naps during the day. but, she does not seem to eat more than 3oz each feed and sometimes even less. throughout the day she eats total of 15-18oz. she is very playful during the day and sometimes takes 45 mins to eat!! exhausting. yes, i tried changing nipple size, but everything is out. at night, i have been trying to put her to bed by 8-8:30, but she wakes up atleast 3-4times at night and it all varies. she finally does wake up at 6am, but since I get up so many times at night, by 6am i can’t get up. so, she falls alseep until 8am. i don’t know how to get her eat well during th day, so she does not eat during the night. Please advise, I am tired!!
December 29th, 2009
@Shruti This could be a chicken and egg problem. She can’t eat more during the day because she’s not hungry because she’s eating so much at night. She can’t stop eating as much at night because she’s not eating enough in the day. The key here is to help her learn to fall asleep on her own at night, so you make sure she’s not waking so much at night just to go back to sleep and only out of true hunger. The next step is to slowly shift some of the feeding from night to day, so it’s not a huge shock to skip an entire meal at night. Hope this helps and good luck!
January 4th, 2010
My baby is 4 months old and has reflux. my pediatrician put her on medication (which is too strong and ineffective in my opinion) but she still believes that i should not stop it. because of reflux, my baby can’t eat a whole bottle or even half of it without vomitting the milk, which made me feed her small meals instead. she does not sleep much at night, if i put her to bed at 7-8pm, she would get up at 10 max, and doesn’t go back to sleep. i can’t get her to stick with a routine, she sometimes falls asleep at 11 pm or even as late as 2 am. she wakes up evry 2 hours, either to eat (because she’s never full) or because of discomfort. and i’m exhausted, can’t find a solution to this. on average, she sleeps a total of 9 hours max including naps. my pediatrician says i should be patient but i can’t get anything done. i feel i have no life at all. please help.
January 22nd, 2010
My baby is 3 & 1/2 months old & is breast fed. He just started on rice this past week & loves it. About a week before that he started want to only sleep with me.He used to sleep from about 10 to 4 wake up eat then go right back to sleep. now he wakes up every 2-3 hrs. He wont go down for a nap unless I walk him. He does everything he can to stay awake. I have to cover him with a blanket till he is aleep then rock him before I can put him down. He never liked to be swaddled. I’ve been trying to lay him down & let him sort it out. But he just gets really mad after about 10-15 min of crying. My friend said she has never heard a baby get so pissed off. any advice as to what I can do?
January 22nd, 2010
@Tala Does your daughter know how to fall asleep on her own? That is a good first step to rule out why exactly she is waking so frequently at night. Waking every 2 hours at night could just be the issue of she doesn’t know HOW to go back to sleep without your help. Solve that problem and she will most likely sleep in longer stretches. Good luck!
January 23rd, 2010
My baby is 4 months old, breastfed. Her nap schedule is changing for the past 2 weeks. She would wake for about 45 minutes to an hour, then nap for an hour, then wake again for another hour and nap again for another hour (sometimes her wake time is between 30-45 minutes)…this cycle repeats itself basically from the time she gets up (around 8-8:30) to 6:00pm. But when she is up, she is happy. However, she used to be able to nap for at least two hours at a time. She is doing well with her bedtime schedule (around 8:00pm) though. Should I try to implement a nap schedule as well? Would that help? It would be great if she could stay up and nap a bit longer each time as I am feeding her every time she gets up, which is every two hours, but I’m not sure if that’s too much. Please advise. Thanks.
January 29th, 2010
@Tala Does your daughter know how to fall asleep on her own? That is usually the first key to helping her sleep in longer stretches. I am not saying she’s not suffering from reflux, but if she’s on strong medication and her sleep hasn’t improved, there is probably more going on. I’d probably need to know more about what you’ve tried but it doesn’t sound like she’s getting enough sleep at all.
I hope you will consider one-on-one consultations, so we can come up with a realistic plan for you. Good luck!
February 11th, 2010
Yvonne, I have exact same issue like you. My almost 4 month old little girl can not stay awake for more than 1h30, sometimes just only 40mins and she was already grumpy just 20 minutes after she woke up from her nap. Like today, she had 6 naps from 8.40am until 5.30pm. The longest stretch was 1 hours and shortest was 25mins. Longest awake spell was 1h55 (once) and shortest was 20 mins (twice), the rest was 40mins. I dont know if I am demaning too much from her. She is a good night sleeper, from 6.30pm – 7.30am with 1 night feed. But in the daytime, she is grumpy, crying just after 20 mins she wakes up. I try to entertain her but I can’t do all the time. My question is: I do really want to set a nap routine for her (3 big naps a day and 2hrs apart), shall I try to lengthen her awaking time even I see her sign of tiredness? WIll it really lengthen her awaking time or just irritate her more??? Please help.
February 14th, 2010
@Maria Your son sounds very normal. There are a variety of sleep coaching methods that I outline in my book, if you’re interested: http://www.babysleepsite.com/ebook. I know what you mean about having a baby who gets really upset. My boys did not fuss, they screamed. They were very intense. I talk about this in my Temperament series here: http://www.babysleepsite.com/temperament/baby-temperament-sleep-intensity/ The key is finding the solution that works well for your baby and your personality, too. Good luck!
February 14th, 2010
@Yvonne At 4 months, it’s typical to not have much of a schedule and have a lot of inconsistency. Some babies can do a schedule earlier, but in general, I’d follow her cues. Good luck!
February 22nd, 2010
This is all sounding very familiar and somewhat re-assuring that this is a phase! My son is 17 weeks and for the last 2 weeks has ‘regressed’ from sleeping 3 to 4 hours to waking every 2 hours. Over the last couple of nights this has worsened to waking every hour or within the hour (after an initial approx 2 hour stretch of sleep from about 08:30pm). I am breastfeeding exclusively & 98% of time he will only go back to sleep through nursing, tho often I believe this is comfort nursing to get back to sleep rather than actual feeding as the feed is so short. The first few feeds I move him back to the cot but later on I am too exhausted and we end up co-sleeping. He will not take a dummy so not sure how I can help him through this, or if indeed he needs this. Three times a day he will nap in my arms for about an hour and a half – if I try and move him to the cot he will either wake immediately or anywhere after 5 to 30 minutes). I think he may start teething soon as he is dribbling a lot too.
March 9th, 2010
Hi
Can anyone please help. My son is 4 months old and my partner and I are like the living dead. My son goes to bed fine at about 7.30 (he’s usually shattered by this point and really wants to go to bed). He then wakes up about 11.30-12.30. I’ve tried soothing him and rocking him but he won’t stop until he has a bottle. He will only have half of it and then goes back to bed. He sleeps for about 30 mins to an hour and then wants the rest of his bottle. I’ve tried soothing him again but to no avail just screaming and sccreaming. He then goes back to bed but struggles to fall asleep properly and whimpers and fusses ( very apparent as he is in with us as we only have 2 bedrooms and my 3 year old is in the other). He then sleeps for about 2 hhours and then is awake again and crying. He doesn’t want milk but will not settle. He doesn;t open his eyes just moans and whinges until I lie him with me in bed and then he will briefly go off until about 5.30 when he cries again and wants some milk ( a couple of ounces). Then he will go back to bed til about 7. We are exhausted and I think I will have a nervous breakdown if this carrries on.Up until about 2 months we had a few occasions of him sleeping through from 9ish to 5am but this has now gone right out the window. Can anyone please help?
March 10th, 2010
I too have had a similar experience. Our daughter was sleeping from 9pm-7am. She is now 4 months old and for the past 2 weeks her sleeping has become more and more interrupted. She began by waking at 3am. A few days later it was 11pm and 3am. Then last night everything fell apart. She was up and crying at 11, 12, 3, 5, and then up at 7am. I only got up to feed her at 3am and the rest of the time we let her cry herself back to sleep. This took about 10-15 minutes each time. My question is, why is this happening? I don’t think she’s hungry because she’s able to go back to sleep without eating. She has never been a good napper (only 30-45 min @ a time and I always put her down awake. She’s used to getting to sleep on her own.) Should I just keep letting her cry herself back to sleep? Should I put her down for the night awake? Is she too hot? Too cold? HELP!
March 10th, 2010
As I write the tears roll down my cheek. I am so tired!! My 4 month old wakes every hour and will not go back to sleep unless I bring her into bed with us and breastfeed her. But she constantly moves around keeping me awake and it seems like neither of us sleep all night. I try to put her in her cosleeper but she doesn’t like it. Of course. Some nights she will sleep in it for maybe 2 hours if I am lucky. So I can try to let her cry it out but she will not stop until I pick her up and breastfeed her. I also give her one bottle at night of formula to help her go back to sleep. I feel so bad for her and for us. We are all sleep deprived and cranky. During the day she hardly ever naps. Maybe one nap every couple days for an hour. Ikes! This just doesn’t seem normal.
March 19th, 2010
As I sit here now sick with some sort of virus due to lack of sleep, it makes my heart happy for some reason to see that I am not alone with having a baby that sleeps like absolute crap now. I am one to immediately think that there is some kind of illness associated with any behavior change but the doc has ruled that out. And it looks like from all these testimonies and other research that 4m olds can apparently just take a sleeping schedule and throw it out the dang window. Sophie slept like clock work from 9a-5p for months and then one night- it was just over. After reading Nicole’s info on sleep habits, my girl is totally doing the deep-light sleep thing. She is now in her swing (which I hate but I HAVE to get well) and slept last night 10p-4a which was kind of her. However, I need to figure out how to get her back in her crib and break her of her paci addiction. And ideas? I’m having surgery in a couple weeks and am not going to be able to pick her up for a week – 10 days and really really would like for my husband to not turn into a zombie from waking and working 24/7.
March 22nd, 2010
Joanna,
What a tough situation for you! Hopefully you are starting to feel better. Have you taken a look at this post about 4 month olds schedule? Given that you have a short period of time before your surgery, it might be helpful to try and get your daughter on as much of a schedule as possible. You can read it here: http://www.babysleepsite.com/schedules/4-month-old-schedule/ Also, it would be helpful if you had a really good bedtime routine down switching off with you and your husband putting her down so that she’s used to that when the time comes for just daddy to take over.
March 24th, 2010
@ Amy- My first question would be about what kind of schedule does he have during the day? Day time schedule and naps can really affect nighttime sleeping. I reocmmend reading this post on 4 month old schedules for a place to start: http://www.babysleepsite.com/schedules/4-month-old-schedule/ Also, if he’s moving around quite a bit at night, you might consider checking with your doctor about possible food allergies or sensitivies as this and waking up crying can be a symptom of that. Best to rule it if you can.
@ Nara- She could actually be hungry or going through a growth spurt. Babies this age will still typically feed 1-3 time per night. You might trying feeding her 1-2 times for a few days and see if it evens back out if she’s going through a growth spurt. I would also recommend you check out the link I just posted for Amy for additional 4 mo information.
@ Joelle- Have you check with your pediatrician to rule out any medical reason for her waking and lack of napping? If you are breastfeeding, I would try logging what you eat and how she sleeps to see if you notice any patterns.
May 18th, 2010
as i type this, i have been holding my 15 week old daughter for about 3 hours now so she’ll stay asleep… this habit has gotten worse over the past week and i’m ready to start sleep training her (let her cry it out) but i’m afraid she’s too young? we let our son cry it out at 5 months old, and it worked like a charm.
my daughter only wakes once to eat, but it’s getting her to stay asleep at the beginning of the night that’s the problem. (as long as she’s being held, she’s fine!) i bathe her and nurse her at 7pm, and she’ll usually sleep in her crib for about 45 minutes, then cries to be held. one of us holds her for a couple hours, then we finally go to bed.
what do i do??
May 28th, 2010
My 4.5 month old son can’t go to bed unless he is put in bed awake, at bedtime, in his usual-styled jammies and allowed to fall asleep, unassisted (he has been going to sleep on his own with this routine for 2 months now.) He used (past tense) to sleep for 7-9 hours and would wake up and wrestle around a bit until I heard him and would feed him (he’d be all smiles in the crib) and then he’d return to sleep for another 1-2 hours… All that leapt out the window 2-3 weeks ago and now he goes to bed at his normal time (8 pm) doing his normal bedtime routine but now has been waking up screaming every 2 or 3 hours… He only wants to eat an ounce or two – and will promptly fall back to sleep and sleep like a log for 1.5 hours until he is wailing again… it is quite puzzling (honestly) because I don’t know how to get him any more routine than we already are… but I’d love to get some sleep. Any thoughts?
June 2nd, 2010
My four month old really needs his pacifier to get to sleep and has only just started waking many times in the night wanting it back! HELP! Do I just take it away from him entirely? I need my sleep back!
June 2nd, 2010
Hi Valerie,
The four month mark can indeed be a tough one. It would be best to try and break the sleep association that she currently has with a need to be held during the first few hours of sleep. It seems as though she’s having a difficult time getting through that first light sleep cycle that happens after you fall asleep. How is she napping during the day? If she’s not getting enough sleep during the day, it might be affecting her nighttime sleep. If you haven’t already, I’d check out this post to compare your current schedule with the ones that Nicole recommends: http://www.babysleepsite.com/schedules/4-month-old-schedule/
I’d also considering some sleep consultations with Nicole as she can help with a specific plan for your situation that will address the sleep association as well as get you all on the path to early sleep habits. You can find out more about her services here: http://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-toddler-sleep-consulting-services/
June 2nd, 2010
Hi CC,
Your baby has a sleep association with the pacifier where he now needs it to go back to sleep and to stay asleep. He will need to start learning to fall asleep or to self soothe without your help (i.e. putting the pacifier back in.) I’d recommend reading over this post about how to start a sleep training plan for your baby here: http://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/sleep-training-from-no-cry-to-cry-series-part-1/. Nicole address how to help your baby learn to sleep without a sleep association in her book, Help Your Child Sleep, which you can read more about here: http://www.babysleepswell.com/
June 2nd, 2010
Hi Rachelle,
Is there a possibility that he’s teething or going through a growth spurt? Is he getting enough sleep during the day? Another thought would be to try sending dad in (if that’s possible) when he wakes and see if he responds differently or if he’ll start to stay asleep longer. If it doesn’t seem like there’s some other physical reason for him to wake, (i.e. wet diaper, hungry or sick) then I’d try going in and patting and shushing him for a few minutes to see if he’ll resettle. By going in and picking him right up away and feeding him there lies the possibility of creating a sleep association. You might also consider some sleep consultation services from Nicole for a specific strategy related to your situation. You can find out more about those here: http://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-toddler-sleep-consulting-services/
June 2nd, 2010
update—we returned from vacation last week and decided to do “baby boot camp.” (letting her cry it out). she is 16 weeks old, the pedo told us it was okay, and i was convinced that it was simply a matter of her wanting to be held. so far–last night (the first night) she only cried for 30 minutes then slept all night (from about 8 till 4am when i had to wake her to feed her because i was so full of milk!) and tonight she cried for 50 minutes.
today she napped really well too!
i highly recommend “healthy sleep habits, happy child” by dr. marc weissbluth.
June 2nd, 2010
My son, Nathan is now 4 months old. At about 1 month old his pediatririon told us he had colic. We then would put him in his bouncer, swing, or car seat to sleep. This way he was at an incline. He was into a really good night routine… Bath, massage, pajamas, I’d nurse him, then bed. He’d sleep anywhere from 4-5 hrs. Until about 4-6 weeks ago, I hurt my back and could no longer bend over to lay him down so he now sleeps with my husband and I. In the beginning it was ok. He slept great! No he wakes up every 2 hrs either crying to nurse or screaming his head off wanting nothing to do with anything. I have tired time and time again to put him in his crib, swing, bouncer, or even his car seat … failing every time. He sreams his head off until I pick him up again, nothing works! I don’t want him to get to the point of no return and only want to sleep with us. I feel like he has just gone backards. What can I do to try to get him to sleep on his own and “through the night?”
June 4th, 2010
Hi Katie,
Some babies simply do not do well co-sleeping as movements or noises from their parents can wake them easily. What’s going to be important here is to create a sleep training strategy for your family and then really work towards your ultimate goal of getting him to sleep long and to sleep in his own bed (since he seems to one of those babies that doesn’t do well sleep with mom and dad. My son was the same way.) I’d recommend reading Nicole’s series of posts on sleep training starting with the first one here: http://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/sleep-training-from-no-cry-to-cry-series-part-1/ If you want some additional personalized help, then Nicole is always available for sleep consultations. You find information on that here: http://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-toddler-sleep-consulting-services/
June 6th, 2010
My son is 4 months old. We put him down for naps during the day about every 2 1/2 hours. He only sleeps for about 30-45 min each time. At night, he falls asleep after eating (put down still awake) and goes to sleep no problem. He goes to sleep at 5pm. I have tried to put him down later, like 7 or 8, even one time 10pm. No matter what time he goes down, he always wakes at 3am to eat. He’s getting 10 hours of sleep, which is great. The problem is getting him back to sleep after that. If i put him back in his crib, he’ll cry. If I put him in bed with me he’ll lay there and nurse until he falls asleep, but will wake up every hour and will nurse on and off if I let him. I sometimes do, just so I can catch some sleep, but need help getting him to go back into his crib, so I can quit sleeping in the bed in his room and go sleep with my husband. Or any ideas on how to “shift” his 10 hour stretch?
June 11th, 2010
Hi Kristen,
This is a situation where it would be best to create a sleep coaching strategy to help him learn that nighttime is for sleeping and to learn to re-settle himself after waking. Of course at this age, it’s not unusual for a baby to need to eat 2-3 time a night but your goal here would be to get the sleep stretches to be longer and to stop the every hour feedings. By letting him nurse every hour when he wakes in the early morning hours, it will create a sleep association for him that he will think he has to have that to sleep. I’d recommend starting with this post about starting your sleep training strategy http://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/sleep-training-from-no-cry-to-cry-series-part-1/ If you find you need some more personalized and specific help, then I’d recommend contacting Nicole for some one-on-one sleep consulting. http://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-toddler-sleep-consulting-services/
July 14th, 2010
My baby is 5 1/2 months old and sleeps for a 10 hour stretch, but not at the ideal time. He goes to sleep early (like 5, sometimes 6) and then will wake around 2 or 3am. Eats, then back to sleep until 6am, eats and then up at 8 or 9am. I have tried keeping him up later, but he still wakes up at the same time, sometimes earlier! (like 1am). My questions are: What can I do to adjust his long stretch back a few hours? and should I be eliminating the 6am feeding if he ate at 3? He usually eats every 3 hours during the day.
Thanks!
July 16th, 2010
Hi Chrissy,
I’d recommend looking over this post on 6 month schedules and compare your schedule with it for places where you might make a shift to begin adjusting his bedtime. Although from what you’ve described, it seems like a pretty good nightly sleep pattern if he’s going to be by six and not getting up for the day until 8 or 9 am. At this age, he will probably still need one to two feedings at night so that’s within range as well. If he’s not getting a good morning and afternoon nap, then this is mostly likely the reason for his early bedtime. Here is the post with 6 month schedules: http://www.babysleepsite.com/schedules/6-month-old-baby-schedule/
July 25th, 2010
I have a 4 month old and I’m concerned that I’m putting her to bed for the night to late.
7:30am – She wakes up – feeds
8am – Nap
10:30am – Up -feeds – plays
12 – 1pm – Feeds – Nap
3:30pm – Up – Feeds – Plays
5:30pm – Feeds – Nap
8pm – Up – Feeds – Plays
9:45pm – Feeds – Short nap
10:15pm – Up – Plays
11pm – Feeds – Asleep for the night
On this sleep pattern she sleeps through the night for 8.5 – 9 hours every night. I know babies should be going to bed early… is 11pm to late? I’m afraid if I put her to bed earlier she will wake up a lot earlier and wont go back to sleep. I’m enjoying not having to do a mid- night feeding but am I being selfish?
July 26th, 2010
Hi Ashley,
Your baby does need to be going to bed earlier. If you take a look at the recommend/suggested schedule for a 4 month old (http://www.babysleepsite.com/schedules/4-month-old-schedule/) you will see that your schedule is really similar except that she’s napping for approx. 2.5 hours after she’s only been awake for a half hour. This is most likely because she’s not getting enough sleep at night. A baby at this age should really be 11-12 hours at night and 3-4 hours total of naps. Right now, your baby is getting 8.5-9 hours at night but almost 7 hours sleep during the day. This may be okay for now as you both settle into figuring sleep and her overall schedule and needs, but you are going to want to work to get her on more of a schedule like the one suggested here. By shifting her schedule to be more like the one suggest in the link I just posted, then she will be getting on a schedule and routine that provides her with more adequate sleep at night and less napping during the day. It will also help her to become accustomed to a healthy sleep pattern as she gets older. While this schedule has worked well for you now, it will most likely become a problem for you later on. It does sound like she’s a good sleeper already, so putting her to bed earlier doesn’t necessarily mean she’ll be up and awake earlier.
July 27th, 2010
my 4 mth old baby girl has her own schedule of continous 9-10 hr sleep with one feedin in between and a half an hr nap every two hrs on wakin up. she takes 5 oz of formula 6 times every 3 1/2 hr. the problem s that she postpones her night sleep by two hrs every two days and her 10 hr sleepin time has gone round the clock with it bein 6 am for the past two days. since i am not workin now i also follow her but i gotta join back in a month and would really like to get her into a night time sleepin schedule. how do i get started?
August 6th, 2010
Hi Asha,
I’d recommend that you start by reading through this series about sleeping training as a way to get an idea about how to start devising a sleep training plan. http://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/sleep-training-from-no-cry-to-cry-series-part-1/ If you find you need some additional help, then I’d recommend you consider some one on one email consultation with Nicole. You find more about those services here: http://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-toddler-sleep-consulting-services/