If you’ve followed this blog for a while, you’re likely no stranger to the concept of sleep regressions. You’ve probably experienced them first-hand, right? 😉 If you’re new here, however, let us fill you in. A sleep regression refers to a period of time when a baby or toddler who’s been sleeping well suddenly begins waking at night and during naptime or even refusing to go to sleep at all.
There are several distinct regression phases that most babies and toddlers experience: one at 4 months, another at 8, 9, or 10 months, a third around 18 months, and (as if three weren’t enough!) a final one around 2 years. This article will focus on some of the challenges surrounding your 2 year old’s sleep, including elements that are part of the 2 year sleep regression.
5 Facts About Your 2 Year Old’s Sleep
As your toddler grows, she needs progressively less sleep than she did as an infant. Most 2 year olds need approximately 12 hours of sleep in a 24 hour period, on average; compare that to a newborn’s need for about 16 hours of sleep! And of course, most of your toddler’s sleep is happening at night now. You may also find that your 2 year old is showing more resistance to bedtime than usual, and that she’s falling asleep late. Or, she may be waking too early. All this adds up to equal less downtime (and maybe less sleep!) for you.
Nicole’s note:
“We start getting a lot of e-mails around this time of year that toddlers are beginning to “fight bedtime.” Here in the States, when we are approaching summer, it stays light later and this can directly influence your toddler’s internal clock. Nights may get shorter, but this is temporary! She may truly be unable to fall asleep at an earlier time.”
2: Your 2 year old’s separation anxiety may resurface around this time.
Separation anxiety peaks around 18 months, but it can appear off and on until your child is 5 or 6 (or maybe even after! Yikes!!) At age 2, separation anxiety can be based on actual fear; your 2 year old may be afraid to be left alone, or with people he doesn’t know. However, it can also come from a desire not to miss out on the fun! By now, your 2 year old knows that when you leave, you don’t just disappear. Instead, he knows that you’re off somewhere not far away, having (in his mind, at least) tons of fun without him. Understandably, he doesn’t want to be left out! If this separation anxiety surfaces as soon as you walk out the door during naptime and/or bedtime, it can disrupt your toddler’s sleep.
Nicole’s note:
“Many parents report they have to, all of a sudden, stay with their 2 year old as she falls asleep at nap and bedtime. This is SO common!”
3: Your 2 year old may suddenly stop napping.
Around 2 years of age, some toddlers abruptly stop taking an afternoon nap. You might find that when you put your 2 year old down for her nap, she spends the entire hour talking/laughing/singing/playing. Or, you may find that your 2 year old’s nap resistance isn’t nearly so pleasant — she may spend the whole hour screaming! As with separation anxiety, this sudden resistance to naps can come from your 2 year old’s desire not to miss out on anything. It can also be the result of her growing self-awareness and independence — she’s becoming more aware of what she wants, so if she doesn’t want to lie down for a nap, she’s going to let you know it!
We advise parents to treat this sudden naptime resistance as a regression, and not as something permanent. Most children won’t completely give up their naps until 3 or 4. It’s best to simply stay consistent with your 2 year old’s schedule and routine, and to not give up on the nap just yet.
Nicole’s note:
“All 2 year olds are different, of course. We, personally, had to stop allowing a nap around 2 1/2, because my son’s awake time approached 7 hours after nap and waking up at 3pm…well you can do the math. It was after my bedtime!”
4: Your 2 year old may be going through some transitions that disrupt sleep.
There are a few common transitions your 2 year old may be experiencing:
- Moving to a big boy / big girl bed: Although more children make this transition closer to age 3, some toddlers make this step at age 2. This new sleeping arrangement can make it harder for your 2 year old to sleep well at night and for naps, since the new bed is unfamiliar. You may also find your 2 year old taking advantage of his new-found freedom and getting out of bed often. This happens even when you’ve told him again and again to stay put! (A side note: Whether you do it age 2 or wait a bit longer, when the time does come to make the move to a big kid bed, we recommend that you toddler proof your toddler’s room carefully.)
- Potty training: Again, most children aren’t potty trained until age 3 (or even later.) But some parents begin the potty training process around age 2. If your 2 year old is in the midst of potty training, you may find her waking from sleep and needing to use the potty. Even those 2 year olds who haven’t begun potty training yet are becoming more aware of their bodily functions. It’s not uncommon for toddlers this age to wake early in the morning from a full bladder or needing to poop. And by age 2, most children are much more aware of the uncomfortable feeling that a full diaper causes.
- New sibling: Of course, this doesn’t apply to all 2 year olds, but around age 2, some children are preparing for or adjusting to having a new brother or sister around. This is a huge change for toddlers, and (as with all major changes) it can cause lots of anxiety for them. Couple that with the fact that the new baby is likely causing some anxiety for you, too (as you work to juggle multiple schedules) This can mean that no one is getting much sleep!
Nicole’s note:
“We potty trained around 2 1/2 with both boys (which was late for one and a good age for the other). You might remember my article about potty training my second son, here: 6 ways Potty Training is Like Sleep Training.”
5: Your 2 year old may begin having nighttime fears.
By age 2, your toddler is becoming much more imaginative. This makes for really fun and entertaining play, but boy, can it ever be a problem at night! Most 2 year olds’ nighttime fears are triggered by the dark, and all the things that come with it — spooky shadows, monsters lurking under the bed, etc. By this age, toddlers are growing more aware of the world and realizing that there are “bad guys” and things out there that can hurt them. These new nighttime fears can lead to things like nightmares, and even night terrors.
Nicole’s note:
“My eldest (who inspired this blog) began to be afraid of dinosaurs, no matter how many times I tried to define the word ‘extinct’. 🙂 These aren’t always rational fears to us adults, but very real to them, so be patient and empathetic.”
As with any regression or phase, the best thing to do when you encounter these problems is to cope as best you can. Work hard to stay consistent, and try to remind yourself that it won’t last forever. 🙂 Keep in mind, too, that you don’t want your toddler to form any bad habits while you’re working on getting through the 2 year sleep regression, so let that guide your decisions about how you’re going to cope. As Nicole always says, “You don’t want to make or continue long-term habits for a short-term phase.”
Finally, if you’re doing your best to cope with your 2 year old’s terrible sleep but are finding yourself at the end of your rope, consider contacting us. We have the products and services you need to get your 2 year old sleeping well again.
Hi,
My son who will be 2 in August has started waking up between 4:30-5:15am every morning. It’s been this way for the last 2-3 months. My husband and I are exhausted. He usually takes a nap between 11:45-1:30pm and goes to sleep about 8pm. Any advice or suggestions to remedy these easily wake ups?
Yours sleepily,
Asha
Hi @Asha – Thank you for writing to us about your 2 year old! I am sorry to hear that he is waking so early! We know how brutal those early morning wakings can be, and can relate with how exhausted you and your husband must be! With toddlers, it’s all about setting limits and expectations, and then being consistent, so don’t give up!
For more help with getting his schedule back to a better place for all of you, you may want to consider our 5 Step Toddler Ebook.
You can find out more about this EBook here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/5-step-system-toddler
Good luck and hang in there Asha!
Hi there! My daughter just turned 2 and has a big girl bed which she has had for almost a month now and still not used
To it , and sleeping with her sister in their room. She was a great sleeper and now started last week no naps, sleeping late about 9:30, getting up at 2:30 and when I put her to bed I have to lay next to the bed until she falls asleep. I am beyond tired I’m not sure what’s going on. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Hi Jasmine- Thank you for writing us! I’m sorry to hear your daughter is having trouble sleeping. You’re not alone! The 2 year mark can be trouble for even the best sleepers!! What you describe is similar to sleep challenges we work with families on every day! It sounds like you have few different things going on, and since you’re also “beyond tired” (we understand!!), I believe you could really benefit from one of our Personalized Sleep Consultation packages, where we will work with you on a detailed plan – one that you can commit to and feel good about, and one that will get you all back on track with great sleep! You can read about all of our sleep consultation packages here:
https://www.babysleepsite.com/services/
Hang in there Jasmine, and please contact us if you need any further assistance!
My 19 month old daughter has been sleeping in her toddler bed for months now and doing fabulous! Then all the sudden about 3 weeks ago now she started getting up 4-6x a night. Never crying just walks to get me and I take her back to bed an remind her not to get up, but shortly after shes up again. She shares a room with her 3.5yr old sister and has a baby brother who will be here in 2 weeks. I need my rest as I will be up a lot with my newborn very soon. She also will fall asleep in seconds if I am simply next to her.. would letting her sleep with her sis maybe help..?
Hi Lynsey,
Thank you for visiting The Baby Sleep Site! I’m so sorry to hear you’re dealing with these night wake-ups, especially when you’re trying to get ready for a new baby! It sounds like you may be dealing with the 18 month regression, and we have an article to help here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-sleep-patterns/why-18-month-sleep-regression-can-be-hardest/
However, night wakings like this can also be a sign of a scheduling issue, so you may want to look at her nap and make sure the timing’s right. I hope it resolves for you, but please know that one of our sleep consultants would be more than happy to help if you continue to have trouble. Hang in there – I know this age can be hard!
My son was a fantastic sleeper since he was born. He would go to sleep in his own bed without any issues……until a week ago. He is now almost 23 months and has entered the super clingy at bedtime phase. We do the same bed time routine, but as soon as I get him near his bed it’s a full melt down. We have tried letting him cry it out but he’s very peristant and we are afraid of keeping our neighbors awake (we live in a townhouse). He will fall asleep with us in our bed or on the couch and transfers to his own bed fine, it’s just the initial falling asleep part. I’ve researched that a lot of kids go through a form of separation anxiety at this age and since it is summer and lighter longer they are awake longer too, but everything we have tried hasn’t helped.
Hi Megan,
Thank you for visiting The Baby Sleep Site. I’m so sorry to hear that your bedtimes have gone downhill recently! We do have an article on toddler separation anxiety here that I hope will help: https://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/baby-toddler-sleep-separation-anxiety/
But, if you’ve tried several things already and are still struggling, it may be that you have a larger issue in your schedule, routine, or environment that is contributing to the trouble at bedtime. If you continue to have trouble, please know that our sleep consultants work with kids this age with separation anxiety often, and would love to help your family, too. You can read more about our consultation packages here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-toddler-sleep-consulting-services/
Good luck!
My son is 2 years (27months). He is in daycare m/w/f and with my mom (grandma) t/th, and with us on the weekends. Around December/January he started refusing his nap at home. I would hold him in the rocking chair on the weekends during his nap just so that he would sleep. My mom found different ways to get him to sleep, sometimes with her in a rocking chair, sometimes while watching Sesame Street, or sometimes in the middle of reading a book. He would scream bloody murder when you put him in the crib and cried for more than an hour with no nap in sight. I was pregnant when it started although I don’t think he knew what was happening. I got him a toddler bed and tried that both at my house and at my moms. He refused that as well. Mind you, he loves his crib at night, reaches for it and goes right to sleep. He since has a new baby brother (April) who he loves. I decided he HAS to be able to take a nap for everyone’s sanity. I got him in the toddler bed for nap time with playing music. That worked about 3 times. Now he just keeps himself awake by singing a song, hitting himself or just getting up and down. I’ve tried leaving the room and he just runs around. I tried the crib again, and again he screams bloody murder. He gets in the crib at night around 715-730 ish and is awake around 7-730am. They say he does “okay” at daycare and usually gets about an hour. I’m just not sure how to enforce nap time on him and that he has to sleep in the bed. Help!
Hi @Jackie, I’m so sorry you’ve been struggling with your son’s sleep! That is especially frustrating when dealing with a newborn (I know this from experience as well). We have a free guide you are able to download with tips on toddler sleep since they can be so particularly challenging: https://www.babysleepsite.com/toddler-sleep-tips
Hopefully the tips in the guide will help with the transition but if it does not go into enough detail for what you need, let us know. We have many other resources and you may want to consider working with a sleep consultant that can answer your specific questions each step of the way. For more information on that you can read about it here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-toddler-sleep-consulting-services/
Hang in there! I hope things improve for you soon.
We just moved which I know can drastically impact a 2-year olds schedule/ routine. The last 3 nights she has been getting up and freaking out, screaming and crying until you come get her and hold her for a minute. We’ve had to sit next to her crib until she falls asleep but don’t want to develop the habit.
We can’t let her cry it out as we do have neighbors (townhome) that have young kids as well.
Any suggestions?
Hi @Carolyn Durant, thanks for writing. I am so sorry you’ve been struggling with your daughter’s sleep during the move (I just moved too and can 100% relate!). It will take some time to adjust but in the mean time you’ll have to delicately navigate between comforting and not creating bad habits that last beyond the adjustment period. Here is a link to download a free guide with toddler sleep tips that has helped me walked that fine line with my toddler’s: https://www.babysleepsite.com/toddler-sleep-tips
If you need more specific advise beyond what the guide provides, let us know. Our sleep consultants would love to help out and have a lot of experience working with families in similar situations as you. You can read about and purchase those options here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-toddler-sleep-consulting-services/
Hope this helps!
our toddler is almost 2 and has just started going through a bit of a regression. The first part is he is now taking up to 2 hours to go to bed of a nighttime where before it would take around 15 minutes. The second is he occasionally wakes in the middle of the night and won’t go back to sleep for hours. We are not sure if the second is part of a regression or a side effect of teething etc. Either way we are hoping that by the time our 2nd comes along in another 5 months, he is sleeping soundly
Hi @Nick, thanks for writing and congratulations on your pregnancy! It can be challenging but hopefully things resolve quickly. We have a link to a free guide on toddler sleep that may give you some tips to get through it: https://www.babysleepsite.com/toddler-sleep-tips
If you need more help before the baby comes, let us know! We have a team of sleep consultants that would love to help. You can view our different options for more hands on help here if you need: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-toddler-sleep-consulting-services/
Hang in there!
Hello,
My son will be 22 months on 2nd June.
We did cry it out method when he was 6 months old, only took 4 days and hes been a fab sleeper since. Normally 7 till 7 and nap 12 till 230.
But now!! He wakes at 6, sometimes half 5. Never a bother he just sings and plays till we hear him n get him up, he is also semi toilet trained (which he showed signs of at 19 months, this isnt something we put in place) so we dont leave him too long in his cot as he needs his morning wee.
Has a nap in the day around 12/1230 and I dont let him sleep beyond 230. We have a lovely bath story and bed routine which take around 45 mins which is lovely and never any trouble. Again no bother but he sings and plays in his cot for hours!! sometimes till 10pm. This has been happening for 3 weeks now and its just bothering me. In himself he is fine like I said he plays and doesnt cry or anything.
Any advice id really appreciate!
Amy C
Hi @Amy Coulton, thanks for writing to us! I am glad to hear your son is doing so well but I am sorry that he has been playing in his crib before going to bed. I remember my son doing something similar around that age. It is possible it is just a phase and will soon pass, but if things continue or you just want more information on toddler sleep you may find our ebook on toddler sleep helpful. You can read more about it here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/5-step-system-toddler/
I hope this passes for you quickly and that he stays in good spirits in the mean time! 🙂
Hello, I have a 23 Month Old that has always been a fantastic sleeper. Up until about 4 weeks ago he slept 7 – 7 and 12-2. He has always self settled and has been in a big bed for the past 3 months.
Now we are having daily fights. He goes to day care and sleeps 12 – 1.30/2 and is awake by 7 every morning.
The evenings are relaxed and nothing has changed but now he screams when we leave the room after stories and can take anything from 30 minutes to 1 hour to get to sleep and 95% of the time he is just entertaining himself.
He isn’t ready to drop his sleep and hard because of Day care but I am wondering whether he is sleeping to long and whether I should just accept that he doesn’t need to start bedtime rountine until 7.30/8
Any advice?
@Holly – Thank you for reading and for sharing with us! This is a rather wonky age for sleep as 2 year olds are just more active and needing less total sleep in general. We feel your pain! Trial and error in scheduling is usually your best friend at this stage. Check out our Toddler e-book for more tips and advice on scheduling – https://www.babysleepsite.com/5-step-system-toddler/ Hang in there, Holly!
Hi,
Just wondering if there is any general advice where an older sibling is sharing with a toddler. My 2yr old has been a fantastic sleeper since some help from a sleep consultant when he was younger. Recently we are finding when his half brother is here with us (he stays for half the week), it is really hard to settle my toddler. I think he is actively making himself stay awake until his older brother comes to bed. Then just gets over excited when he sees him coming up to bed. The toddlers bed time is 7.30pm and his older brother is meant to be 8pm (however he is pushing boundaries and it often is 8.30/9pm before he’s in bed). I am just wondering if I should change the little ones bedtime when he is here so they both go to bed at a similar time? Or is it likely a passing phrase? When his half brother isn’t staying with us he is settling to sleep fine without issue.
Thanks
Hi @Annabel, thanks for writing to us. I am sorry you’ve been struggling getting your toddler settled down when his half brother is staying with you. It is possible it will pass, or it may be necessary to establish some limits for him to keep him on track. We have a free guide for help with toddler sleep that will provide some tips and links to other resources within it that may help give you some ideas: https://www.babysleepsite.com/toddler-sleep-tips
If you find the problem persists and your toddler is beginning to get overtired, let us know and our sleep consultants would be happy to help craft a plan for him and give you additional tips to help through this transition. For more information on that, please feel free to contact us directly here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/contact
I hope this helps!
May 21, 2018
Hello,
My son will be 2 in July and sleeping has always been a scream fest. Nap and bedtime. As soon as you lay him down he will start whining and get up and then as you close his door he screams and throws everything out of his crib. Before, he would throw everything out and then fall asleep, now not so much. And then he also wakes during the night and screams. He will go on for hours if I leave him alone. I have no idea what to do. We try to let him cry it out but he will go on for hours and I don’t feel that’s acceptable. Please help
Hi @Ashley –
Thank you for writing us! I’m so sorry to hear your son is having trouble sleeping, and that this excessive crying and fighting sleep has been going on for so long! You’re not alone and we completely know how tough this can be! What you describe is similar to sleep challenges we work with families on every day.
I do believe you could benefit from one of our Personalized Sleep Consultation packages, where we will work with you on a detailed plan – one that you can commit to and feel good about. All of our e-mail packages come with a Personalized Sleep Plan, which is a detailed guide written just for your family given your sleep history you share with all about your toddler’s sleep. The Personalized Sleep Plan will provide you with step-by-step instructions on how to achieve all your goals, and we can take a few steps back and work on things more gently, if you would like to minimize the crying.
You can read about all of our sleep consultation packages here:
https://www.babysleepsite.com/services/
Hang in there and contact us if you need any further assistance!
I have a two year old who stopped napping , sleep . When he was 6 months he started sleeping in hour or,mins in a day or either not sleep the entire day , but would be crawling walking running all day. With that said he still would sleep past 1 or so and last max 3 hours he’d be actually very tired and sleep at sunrise. Now that he is two he has tons of energy running all day jumping gets mad very bad and still doesnt nap normally I know i should not let him sleep when he hits the sleepy point but by that time i can hardly stay awake .His doctor says he has alot of energy thats good he’ll achive much in life while you tired?
Hi @Andrea, thanks for writing to us. I am so sorry to hear you’ve been struggling with your son’s naps. Here is a link to a free guide that may help give you an idea of where to start: https://www.babysleepsite.com/free-baby-nap-guide/
If the article is not specific enough, I think working with a sleep consultant would really benefit you. You can work one-on-one with them and they will create a plan of action for you to get your son back on a schedule that works with your family and helps his sleep get back on track which will be so good for him and your family. To read more about our options you can visit here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-toddler-sleep-consulting-services/ or contact us directly at [email protected] with any questions! I hope this helps.